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M'lady & Moi.

Confessions of a 19 year old.

Nana K.ing

Jan 09, 2017

St Olaf College

Nana K.ing

M'lady: What's on your mind baby?

Moi: Hmm. Just the age, that's it.

M'lady: Do you want it to slow down?

Moi: No...

*buries her face in my neck*

Moi: I just...need to absorb the change, need to know a few things.

M'lady: Okay baby.

Moi:

You know..I'm exactly where I thought I'd be.

I'm in love with the best woman I know, in some classy yet modern college with a messy roommate, have good clothes, enough money, friends, my family is ok, I came to terms with my feelings about my dad, I know my religion, I know all the history that made me "me" and why people act how they do towards me.

I've been powerful.

I've been weak.

I've overcome everything.

I'm right where I want to be and have been where I wanted.

Yet...I feel like.

I'm standing behind a closed door, fist (battered, bruised, black and strong) balled and ready to knock, dressed up for the occasion yet with some unsettling dissatisfaction...

I find myself feeling like I've worn the wrong shoes, and now that my feet are placed firmly on the welcome mat I'm excited to enter and see what's behind but ultimately dissatisfied that I am deeply satisfied. I don't know if that makes any sense.

I guess I just wish I had a mirror that told me exactly how I look in these shoes...before I walk right through so I know if what I think is true.

M'lady: ...

¤▪¤▪¤

Keep following to hear her response.

#confessionsofa19yearold

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M'lady & Moi.

Confessions of a 19 year old.

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Because have you ever had to endure grilling your foot on a George Foreman?

1. When he just wanted bacon from his George Foreman grill

2. When he had money (and Jan) issues

3. When he got upstaged at Phyllis' wedding

4. When he unintentionally saved Meredith from rabies

5. When he wore a "bisexual" suit

6. When he had to apologize to Jesus

7. When his GPS drove him into a lake

8. When he had to deal with Ryan as his boss

9. When he couldn't fulfill his most generous empty promise

10. When this happened

11. When he struggled with a X-Mas break up

12. When he had to defend his generosity

13. When he threw a classy Christmas party for Holly but she had a boyfriend

14. When he had to stand up to peer pressure

15. When Toby was "Toby-ish"

This isn't just for the single Pringles out there either, folks

Run Around Clanging Pots and Pans in Everyone's Face

Eat the Last Few Pigs in a Blanket

Pop Twelve White Grapes

Burn Something

Smash Things Against a Wall

Spontaneously Begin an Irish Jig

Call Your Mother

Throw a Coffee Table Out a Window

Sing "Auld Lang Syne" at the Top of Your Lungs

Do Some Squats

Swan Dive into a Nearly Freezing Body of Water

Take a Shot

Time to be merry and bright.

"First Noel" by Leslie Odom, Jr

"A Holly Jolly Christmas" by Burl Ives

"Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas" by Kelly Clarkson

"All I Want for Christmas Is You" by Mariah Carey

"Christmas (Baby Please Come Home" by Michael Buble

"Last Christmas" by Taylor Swift

"The Christmas Song" by Josh Groban

"White Christmas" by Idina Menzel

"O Holy Night" by David Archuleta

"Believe" by Josh Groban

"Les cloches du hameau" by Celine Dion

Or at least try to do.

1. I will wake up (sorta) on time for class.

2. I will look decent for class.

3. I will go to the gym more.

4. I will go to the library and study more.

5. I will meet new people.

For those long nights that turn into mornings when the struggle is real.

1. Walk in motivated and ready to rock

2. Disappointed you let it get this bad

3. Distracted: When a 10-Minute Break Becomes an Hour

4. When the Yearning for Sleep Sneaks Up

5. In the words of Lorelai Gilmore "Coffee, Coffee, Coffee"

Oh, so done.

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