Let me tell you something about myself: I never listen unless I learn something the hard way.
I’m one of those people who have a tendency to let emotions rather than logic lead. I dive right into bad decisions, never stopping long enough to mind the consequences. I know I’m not alone in this — making mistakes is a natural part of life. That being said, however, I’m not blind to the fact that my poor decision-making has only led to regrets. My first semester of college, in particular, has been one bang-your-head-against-the-wall moment after the other. There’s plenty of things I would do differently if I could, from guys to Greek life, social life to school. It’s not only a new semester now but also a new year, and I’m determined not to make these same five mistakes again.
1. I scheduled my classes poorly.
When I first signed up for classes, I was stoked on only having four days of school and huge gaps in the afternoon. Though some days this proved helpful, most of the time it just fostered my laziness. Fridays were almost always wasted on sleep or just lying in bed. Oftentimes, I’d lay there until four or five in the afternoon before finally rolling out and doing something productive. My rationale was that it was a “free day” because I always managed to get my homework done on Saturdays and Sundays in high school. My schedule was also set up so that I didn’t have the same class more than twice in one week, which didn’t leave much room for getting to know people as a three-days-a-week type of class would.
As for the giant gaps of free time, they just enabled my excessive nap-taking. I’d end my morning class around 11 a.m. and then doze off until my next class at 4 p.m., trudging to class both groggy and cranky. I’m a chronic nap-taker, too, and have one every single day. No wonder I had such trouble sleeping at night this past semester. That’s just something I have to be more cognizant of in the future.
2. I skipped class EVERY single time I was tired.
I’m a firm believer in placing your mental and physical health above school, but sometimes I got a little carried away. There was a point this semester where I was missing one to two classes a week, sometimes even three. My excuse was that I needed sleep or that I was feeling under the weather and deserved to lie down. I never got around to correcting the source of the problem, never tried eating better or going to bed earlier. Instead, I let myself take advantage of my own self-leniency and patted myself on the back for it.
In the end, this only hurt me. Sure, there were a few times when I really needed the sleep, but most days were really just a product of my laziness to walk across campus. I ended up receiving a B+ in a class that I loved and did well in simply because of my attendance, or lack thereof. Before attendance was added to the grade book, I had a solid A. Fortunately, I learned my lesson early on, so I know not to make this mistake next semester.
3. I never ate healthily or regularly.
My excessive fatigue could be attributed to a number of factors, but I’m fairly certain my poor diet had a significant part in it. Half of my calories came from processed soup and ramen, the other half from chips and iced teas. I made sure to sprinkle some healthy food in, too, but junk food was definitely my go-to.
To make matters worse, I never ate breakfast and oftentimes skipped lunch as well, much to the horror of my parents. This was never an issue of beauty or weight-loss; I was simply too preoccupied with school, or just plain lazy, to eat. This habit only reinforced my negative cycle of self-neglect. No food meant no energy and brain power, and this only made concentrating in class harder and the naps more frequent. Less time-consuming information during class meant more time studying on my own time, and this meant staying up later at night to do so. This, of course, only led to me getting up late and being exhausted, and therefore lazy, the next day. So the cycle continues — hopefully not in the second semester, however.
Lazy seems to be a common theme throughout my mistakes, predominantly fuelled by my poor self-care, and the number one characteristic I strive to change.
4. I thought joining a sorority was a social necessity to fit in.
For some people, Greek life is exactly the type of social interaction they need — parties, events, a wide network of familiar faces around campus. Don’t get me wrong, I’d love this kind of social security, but I’m far too introverted. This was college, though, and I was supposed to be embracing the unknown and having new experiences. I thought it’d be healthy to step outside my comfort zone and join a sorority. Everyone else was doing it anyway.
The thing is I’ve always made friends with guys easier than girls. I never understood why, and it wasn’t as though I strived to be “one of the guys” in high school — my personality just naturally clicked with them. Turns out putting myself in an exclusively female environment did nothing but stress me out and reinforce my insecurity about not fitting in. I wasn’t nearly as outgoing or lighthearted as these girls, however, no matter how hard I tried to be. At the time, I wasn’t sure if I was trying to push myself to be better or pretending to be someone else.
At the end of the day, I’m simply a quieter person. I did end up dropping Greek life, and though I missed it at first, I’ve been slowly meeting more and more people like me. I met them in study rooms or rhetoric writing classes, the places that reflect my values. I just needed a little guidance from the wrong direction to steer me the right way.
5. I let my social anxiety stop me from just about everything.
The biggest mistake I made the first semester, and throughout my whole life really, was being too afraid of rejection or discomfort to try new things. Besides rush, I kept strictly to my security bubble. Yoga, for example, has been a hobby of mine since senior year of high school, and vital to keeping my mental and physical health balanced. The primary reason why I never attended a yoga class or joined a yoga club was extremely juvenile: I was too afraid of not being able to find the location and awkwardly walk in late. Silly, right?
I never went to the gym for just about the same reason. First off, I was too scared to go alone yet never made a serious effort to find a workout partner. Secondly, I didn’t want to look like a fool because I didn’t know what I was doing. I recognize the flaws in this reasoning, of course — I always do. I won’t ever get over my fear of looking stupid if I never learn the correct form in the first place. Neither will I have a friend to go to the gym with if I don’t reach out to people. When you’re like me and do just about nothing to manage your anxiety, you miss out on a myriad of opportunities in life.
It’s a new semester now, though, and an entirely new year at that. I’ve identified plenty of mistakes and shortcomings from these past few months, and I recognize the effect they’ve had on my degree of life. The only thing left for me to do is actively work to change myself for the better, which is something I wholeheartedly plan to do.
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