This article certainly isn’t an answer or a theory. It’s a weighted question. And in a world that is so consumed with hatred and negativity and destruction, it is a journey. How does one practice mindfulness? Recently, in lieu of finals week, the volunteers at my campus’s wellness center hosted a party in which they gave away tea and pamphlets on being calm. One of the pamphlets had instructions on how to be mindful when eating and showering. When showering, pay attention to how your skin feels in the air before the shower and then how each warm drop feels on your skin. Hear the water hit the floor, and listen for each individual drop. Close your eyes and breathe deeply. Though helpful in some of these small aspects of life, bringing peace to my mind before class each morning, I now seek a pamphlet that teaches me how to lead a more mindful lifestyle. Constantly I find myself getting angry at the smallest things and my anger sends me spiraling towards anxiety and depression. I get tenser as time passes and I struggle to make my body function as it would if it were healthy and happy. My heart tightens and my breathing feels weighted and I hate the world and the people in it. If I catch a happy moment, or even a series of happy moments that stretch into a week or a month, my body never fails to repeat the cycle of hatred. I want to know how to me more mindful. I want to not only feel mindful and appreciative when I am happy, but all of the time. When my vision blurs and I gasp for air, I want to know how to resurface. Meditation only works for so long and comfort fails to present itself in times of need. Netflix recently released a documentary called Minimalism. It was really good and provided a different perspective on happiness and what lengths people go to in this capitalist world to achieve it. The philosophy of the featured men was to only own products that added meaning or purpose to your life. Now, picture your own happy future through rose colored sunglasses. Lots of money? A cute house and a nice car? Love? Now picture a sad future. It probably looks desolate and lacks material goods. This is because the American Dream has been modeled around money and STUFF. Working hard and finding happiness at the end of the road. You either have it or you don’t, apparently. But if this goal is so unachievable for so many people, why is it still practiced? Happiness isn’t supposed to come from goods, it’s supposed to come from within. Mindfulness helps you find happiness from within and helps you appreciate what you already have, and shows you what gives you real happiness in your life and separates it from what brings you negativity. So now the revised American Dream is mindfulness. Is it just as unachievable as the first or is it something that can be taught? I’d like to find out.
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HER WARDROBE:
It's no secret that Blair is a fashionista. From her fabulous headbands that coincidentally go with her every outfit to her in season Tory Burch Flats (because we don't do last season's Tory Burch flats), Blair captivated us with her stunning style every Monday. Being the offspring of the hottest designer on the Upper Eastside and best friends with the "it girl" (debatable) Serena Van Der Woodsen, Blair always had to stay on her toes. Through her fashion, she taught us that no matter what you are going through, you must not look like your struggle. Always be fabulous.
HER LOVE LIFE:
BLUCK or CHAIR? I think we'll just go with the hottest couple on the Upper Eastside as a nickname for these two. This relationship that's shrouded in scandal grew from an illicit affair in a limo...need I say more? Throughout all of the scandals, triumphs, losses and suitors in between, these two have managed to stay ahead of the game and become THE face of Manhattan. How inspirational!
Blair is an icon. A global one at that. She taught us how to color coordinate with with accessories & Dior bags, how to scheme our way out of uncomfortable situations and to never settle for less. We all cringed when she single-handedly sent Georgina Sparks away to a Christian boot camp when she was harassing her bestie, Serena. We laughed when she banished that poor freshman from the Met steps because she was wearing "last season's Tory Burch shoes." We cried when she professed her love for Chuck millions and millions of time during the show. We love you and miss you, Blair. Thank you for teaching us that it's okay to be a total bitch.
2. Making friends is pretty easy
In addition to being nervous, not being able to make friends was my greatest fear. However, I learned that it's actually really simple. You pretty much just have to go up to someone and say "hello." Most colleges also have the freshman come a few days early so they can get acclimated to the campus, which is the perfect opportunity to make new friends.
3. Bathrooms
If you're lucky, you never have to worry about the horror that is communal bathrooms. If I thought sharing two bathrooms between four other people at home was bad, it was nothing like sharing one with a whole floor of people. You lose all sense privacy and it's kinda like a public bathroom, except you have to see these people on a daily basis. Therefore, you know when exactly someone didn't wash their hands. The main thing is, everyone is experiencing this loss of privacy too, and you just have to do your own things without worrying too much about everyone else.
4. Roommates
Photo by Living with a roommate can be a challenge, especially if you've never had to share a room before. The first few weeks are super awkward, but after a while, you figure out a system and learn to cohabit the same space. Just be mindful of them and their space and you'll be fine. And if you're lucky, your roommate ends up being your best friend.
5. College food
Food at college is like food in high school, some days it's good, but most, not really. One difference, though, you pretty much get 24-hour access to food. Which, in my opinion, is the best part of being at school. However, if you find yourself craving a home cooked meal, make sure you have all the pots and pans necessary to make something in the kitchen. Also, make sure you have plenty of easy-to-make foods in your room, in case you don't want to leave your room and/or just want a quick snack.
6. Professors
The most drastic difference between high school and college were the professors. Some professors let you call them by their first name, something I never actually did, and above all, professors do not care if you're there or not. They also won't hold your hand or make sure you hand in assignments. Some professors don't even tell you due dates because they're in the syllabus. That being said, professors are always there if you need help, and are more than willing to find times to meet with you. Professors aren't there to control you or tell you what to do, they're there to teach, whether you're there or not.
7. Classes
College classes are great. Four
8. Netflix
Netflix is a great way to chill-out and relax between or after class, but only in moderation. There are so many times when I decided to watch one more episode instead of starting on that paper or studying for that exam. Despite this, Netflix is a great way to reward yourself for doing work. Did you finish up all the homework for one class? Sweet, go watch one episode. Regardless of when you watch Netflix, just make sure that you have enough time to do all the work that needs to be done.
9. Self-discipline
For most people, college is the first time you get to be on your own, without actually being on your own. You don't have parents or teachers or other adults monitoring what you should or shouldn't be doing. So this means that you have to decide to go to class, you have to decide if you do your work, you have to decide what to do and when to do it. You also have to take care of everything that goes wrong too. Something wrong with your financial aid? You have to go meet with the people. Need a tutor? Go sign up for one. This is the first time you get to test out being an adult, if you make mistakes, oh well, as long as you learn from them.
10. Being yourself
The most important lesson I learned from my freshman year of school; be yourself. Don't let how you think you should act or how you think people expect you to act, ruin your college experience. Just be yourself and do you own thing. If you're worried that people will judge you, don't be. Like I said before, everyone is in the same boat and they're too busy with their own life to be worried about yours. If you act like yourself, you'll have an easier time finding people to spend time with.
College is a whole other world in itself. As long as you find some great friends and don't stress too much, it can be an amazing time.
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