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Health and Wellness

Mindfulness: Being Fully Aware of How Your Actions Affect Others

You can change 80,000 lives in your lifetime. Do you want to hurt or heal those lives?

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Mindfulness: Being Fully Aware of How Your Actions Affect Others
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"I am the sum total of everything that went before me, of all I have been seen done, of everything done-to-me. I am everyone everything whose being-in-the-world affected was affected by mine. I am anything that happens after I’ve gone which would not have happened if I had not come. " - Salman Rushdie

Mindfulness is a term that has been in popular circulation recently. It seems to be the latest trend in how to live in addition to yoga, kale, and spin classes. Mindfulness is a state of being in which a person is fully aware and conscious of the present moment; it is a way to fully enjoy every moment that life has to offer. However, the most important aspect of life one should be mindful of is his or her actions because every single action we make has an effect on someone else's life, whether we are aware of it or not.

Growing up, I was a very quiet individual who often listened and watched others, taking in the scenery around me, as opposed to outwardly contributing--that was how I survived. I was bullied at a young age for being different, for being quiet, and for always being in the out-group. After a great deal of time being constantly insulted, harassed, and teased, every little action hurt. I was like a wounded animal who went through life with a limp, further injured even by a gentle rain. It took many years for me to fully heal and become the well-adjusted person I am today, but I can say from experience that people need to be more aware of how they treat others.

I'm one hundred percent positive that the people who hurt me may not even remember my name, and surely do not recall anything they did that has had a lasting impact on my life. However, I remember their names and images of what they did are still ingrained in my memory, which makes me wonder if I have had the same effect on another person that I am unaware of.

To a person who has been bullied, actions build up like a snowball effect. One small comment may be the catalyst that sends the snowball rolling down a hill, but as time goes on, more comments and actions build up that cause the snowball to grow in size and stature until it becomes an unbearable weight on the victim's back. Every action we make can have a positive or negative effect on the snowball. Even the smallest comment or gesture could cause it to spiral out of control, sending the victim into dangerous territory. A person does not just decide to commit suicide overnight; it takes time for the negative pressure to build up until death begins to seem like a better option than facing another day on Earth where the snowball can only get bigger and add more weight to everyday life.

A comment you make or an action you do could be the first level of the snowball, or it could be the final step until a person cannot bear life for one more moment. No one knows exactly what another person is going through, so that is why we need to treat every single human being with kindness. I know what it is like to feel as if the entire world is your enemy simply because of the actions of a few, so that is why I decided to be the person who can prove to someone that life is worth living because there still is kindness in a world that can seem so cruel. I try to live my life without hate, making the feelings of others a priority because I never know when my actions could change a life, positively or negatively.

Every single action I make has a consequence, like a ripple in a pond that may directly or indirectly hurt or heal someone. After my experience of being hurt, I chose to heal and then continue to be a person who heals others. Of course, I am by no means perfect, but I strive to be a healer through my everyday speech and actions. A small act of kindness, like a smile or a note of encouragement, could make all the difference in a person's life. Be mindful of every moment and mindful of every action because even if you are indifferent in a situation, that has an effect on a person.

As the famous quote goes, "If you are neutral in situations of injustice, you have chosen the side of the oppressor." -Desmond Tutu. Therefore, even an action as simple as doing nothing has an impact because everyone who stands idly by and watches a bully taunt his or her victim allows the victim to be further damaged and is at fault just as much as the bully.

Imagine if you knew the consequence of every single action. Imagine if you knew that when you ignored a girl in the hallway, that was the final layer of snow added to her snowball. Imagine if you knew that your encouraging note to an acquaintance was just what he needed to help him survive the day. Imagine if every word you spoke to a person was printed across his or her body. Maybe then we would consider our actions twice before making them.

However, we are insufferably unaware of what will stem from each choice we make, so the best we can do is to try to consider other people's perspectives before making any decision, and ponder how we would feel in each situation. Live life mindfully while making decisions meticulously and treating others with unprecedented kindness. According to a formula that includes life expectancy, meeting an average of three people per day, and more, the average person is predicted to interact with 80,000 people over the course of a lifetime. That gives you 80,000 lives to impact, and only you can choose to hurt or heal those lives.

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