The Mid-College Life Crisis As Told By Squidward | The Odyssey Online
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Student Life

The Mid-College Life Crisis As Told By Squidward

20 is the new 45, and it sucks.

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The Mid-College Life Crisis As Told By Squidward
www.buzzfeed.com

You're freaking out and realizing you're unsatisfied with your life at the ripe age of 45? LOL. Have you tried being 20 at the end of your sophomore year in college? That sh*t is terrifying. You're going to find yourself wanting to change your life path completely and the thoughts of you never finding a spouse will keep you up at night. So, forget buying a new Ferrari, nothing can quite help you cope with the mid-college life crisis. But I'm here to show you aren't alone.

You call your mom at least twice a week.

And these phone calls are a minimum of an hour.


You've theoretically changed your major four times.

The biology credits will totally go toward an international business degree, right?

Your Google history contains searches for internships, jobs and minimum GPA requirements.

LOL at that time I thought I could get into med school.

In addition to how much you can sell body parts for on the black market.

You've inquired about the annual salary (before tips) for the available position at the local strip club.

The only phrases you find yourself saying are "I'm unstable" and "I'm not OK."

You consider a successful night's sleep to be anything more than three hours.

You've made more than six plans for your remaining semesters.

The emails you send to your advisor have become more like diary entries about everything that is wrong with your life.

You can't stop thinking about the fact you're going to end up alone and without a job.

When the weekend comes along, you go hard.

People often tell you you look dead inside.

And they aren't wrong.

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