Everyone who knows me knows I have a history of mental illness. High school was pretty rough for me and I struggled a lot with depression and anxiety. Both are still things I struggle with to this day. I'm open with my mental illness, but usually, I wait until the subject is brought up. I can't think of a single person I know who doesn't suffer the same way, or in a similar way, that I do.
Here's the truth about suffering from depression, anxiety or any mental illness.
It's. EXHAUSTING.
Like, you know that feeling when you only got maybe four hours of sleep the night before, and you're just trudging through the day barely able to keep your eyes open? That's what having a depression is like.
Only we feel like that on a daily basis.
If you're like me and also have insomnia, it's like a double-whammy of exhaustion. I usually have to take melatonin to help me fall asleep, but the only downside is that I feel it in the morning. So, I'm always tired.
People who have depression and insomnia are screaming about how relatable this is.
AND GUESS WHAT ELSE?! I'm always anxious.
My brain is constantly racing and I'm always worrying about something — even stuff I know I don't need to be worried about. I'm always worried about school and deadlines and work and my organizations and 99 percent of the time I feel like I'm forgetting something and no one is telling me about it.
Unfortunately, being tired just isn't an excuse for me anymore.
I'm at a point in my life where I have to be responsible and I have to get my stuff done. I have to work hard and I have to be healthy and I have to get out of bed every day. I can't keep using my mental illnesses as an excuse to stay in bed and not do my work, instead I have to look at them as an obstacle I will overcome.
I was unlucky enough to be in the percentage of people who have to work a little bit harder than others in order to be successful.
Now, mental health is so so so so so so important, and you should never take on more than you can handle. There is no shame in taking a little longer than your neighbor.
I empathize with those whose depression and anxiety are so bad they can't even leave the bed or go to the store. I understand it is hard, and I have faith you will overcome your struggle.
However, know that there does come a point in your mental health journey when, if you truly want to feel better, you have to do the work. You can't stay in the dark and pray that your responsibilities will disappear forever.
