There's a saying that says: hurt people hurt people. That statement is true for many different reasons, but it applies to relationships in a unique way.
If you're hurting and don't know how to cope in a healthy way, negativity and pain will present themselves in one way or another in your relationships (trust me, I have many first-hand experiences.) And I know it's hard to say that when you're in an abusive relationship (I've also had first-hand experiences of that, too, so I know what it's like).
That's, of course, not to say love can't form between bad mental headspaces, because it absolutely can. However, I've found (and others have, too) that the best relationships flourish to the best they can be when individuals put their emotions, feelings, and mental health first. Here are 10 reasons you should put your mental health before any relationship.
1. A relationship has a better chance of being healthy
Just like the analogy of a breathing mask on an airplane: if you don't put one on yourself first, you won't be able to fully help someone else.
2. You can take care of others better
Healthy mindsets help other people form healthy mindsets.
3. You'll know your limits
If you're secure in your mental health, it'll be clearer to tell when enough is enough.
4. Communication should be easier
Fine-tuning how you communicate will more likely make conflict easier to handle.
5. You'll know when you need to step back and take care of yourself
Knowing yourself well enough to know when to step back is the first step in solving conflict in a healthy way.
6. You can share your helpful tactics with your S.O. if they need them
If you have knowledge on what's helped your mental health, you'll be able to pass that on to your significant other if they're hurting.
7. You'll know your worth
Taking care of you first will teach you the importance of who you are.
8. You can better combat a co-dependent relationship
If you're in a healthy headspace, it's easier to see the signs of co-dependency and face them head-on.
9. You'll be able to battle negativity in a more constructive way
Negativity and conflict are inevitable. If you put your mental health first, it's easier to stand back and be able to see the negativity as a way to grow.
10. You'll notice the signs of when you need help or support
If you're in tune with your mental health, you'll be able to know when you need to get support from counselors, other people, or a medication change (if you use them).
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