To start this thing off I would like to say that I deal with depression and anxiety. At this point I think it is safe to say that everyone has either gone through an episode of mental health issues or to some degree struggles with mental health issues. The question of the hour is have they sought treatment for it or not or have they had an incident that required them to get help.

When I was 17 after struggling for years with a bad home life, bullying, relationship issues and destructive habits it final all came to a head. I lost all hope of a future away from everything going on around me and inside my head. I decided to end it all. As I sat in my bed hoping everything would stop I had a surge of hope that this isn't how life should be and it gets better I immediately regretted the decision I jumped up ran downstairs to asked for help. Through this I was finally able to get help through a out-patient program that would give me the skills that no high school, parent, authority figure or friend was teaching me. Most people either didn't know how to deal themselves so they could not help me or had to follow procedures or wanted to act like it wasn't happening instead of helping.

Through this I learned how to face the stuff that was happening around me and I grew stronger. Sadly the world doesn't see it that way. Because yes I am still in therapy and yes I still have moment where I need to turn around ask other to listen or make slight adjustments in my life. I do not try to hide when I feel depression and anxiety come on instead I try to face it understand why I might be feeling this way and make adjustments. Some adjustment might be to either stay at home instead of going out with my friends, making a schedule to handle my workload so that I do not get too overwhelmed at once or even forcing myself to talk it out with someone else just to get out how I am feeling out. I believe that being able to do this not only makes me a stronger person but also gives me a leg up above everyone because I have the ability to handle whatever life throws at me.

People instead of seeing me as a strong person they view a flight risk and me as unstable. The issue is I cannot change ever persons mind when they have that image and the bigger issue is that paper version of myself is the poster child for this image. I wanted to join the military or work in government since I was in high school. I love the idea of having to work myself to the bone, the discipline and the thought of doing something with purpose. My greatest challenge is overcome the barrier that has been made for me thanks to other peoples image of mental health issues and the labels I've been given thanks to what I look like on paper. The question I want to put out into the world is why does it matter that I've had this incident when I was 17 and have grown since that incident? Why do people who don't have that documentation seem ideal even though they could still struggle from mental health issues and I face challenges because I sought help? Why do we live in a world where my struggles with my mental health are put on blast and I may not be able to do what I want in life because of what happened when I was 17 even though it is five years later?