In the last week of April, 2018, a man in Toronto deliberately killed 10 people, and injured 15 others, by driving a van into a crowd. In May of 2014, a man California performed drive-by shootings that killed 6 people and injured 7 others. The only main link between these two senseless killings is the proclamation that both of these men were "incels".
"Incel" is a portmanteau of the words "involuntary" and "celibate". It's a word that describes people who want to have sex, but they can't find anyone who wants to have sex with them. It's a new and sinister version of being called a "nerd".
The men (whom I refuse to name) that committed the two killings I listed above, did so because they were unable to get anyone to have sex with them. It is a stupidly insidious motive, and the term "incel" has now been flying all over the internet, with multiple news outlets trying to understand why and how these crimes came to be.
If you ask me, I think modern media has created "incel" culture.
In the real world, no one has to have sex with you. You are not owed sex, you don't deserve sex just because you're in modern society, and with everything surrounding the #MeToo movement, it's blatantly obvious that no one should force sex upon something else.
But then, look at the media. Cosmopolitan puts out articles sexualizing male athletes from the 2018 Olympics. The popular app theCHIVE has a multiple lists of womens "under-boob". We have television shows like "Undressed" on MTV, where people meet for a first date naked.
Yesterday, 2 weeks after the Toronto van killings, the Snapchat-news outlet Brother posted a whole slideshow about how bad celibacy is for you. Brother claims that sex makes you smarter, boosts your body's natural defense system, and lowers your blood pressure. They use pictures of people in bed together, or a woman wagging her finger, or a man looking into his underwear to accompany these claims they are stating.
I'm not saying that what Brother is stating isn't true. I know the science behind the claims they are making; but doesn't them posting this a couple of weeks after a man killed 10 people, because he was sexless, seem in bad taste? They are telling people that don't have sex they're unhealthy, and yet we wonder why "incels" are frustrated.
I don't want it to seem like I sympathize with these murders. I don't. But, how is everyone so confused about how we've reach the point where sexless men are taking their frustration out on innocent people? Everyday the media is selling us sex. Porn, sex in television, sexy Instagram models, articles about how to have "The Best Sex Ever OMG" in Cosmopolitan and Men's Health. We are all drowning in a world where sex means everything and people who are voluntarily celibate are seen as weirdos.
This is also in contrast to social movements like #MeToo and modern feminism. Feminists used to believe in freeing your body, burning your bra, and having sex with whoever you feel like because you were liberating your body. Now you have to ask consent to hold your girlfriend's hand or else you've committed an assault against her. I'm not saying there isn't an epidemic of sexual assaults and violence against women, but all of these movements about having to ask for continuous consent go in direct opposition to the media that throws violent constant sex in our faces.
We need to uncross these wires and get back to the basics of what sex in the modern world should be. Have sex with whoever you choose (as long as they choose you too). Don't assault people. Be celibate if you choose to (it's okay, not matter what Brother says, you won't die). And most importantly, NOBODY OWES YOU SEX NO MATTER HOW MUCH BASELESS SEX YOU SEE ON YOUR TELEVISION OR COMPUTER.
