You took advantage of me the second you touched me without my permission. You took advantage of a self conscious, insecure, intoxicated young college girl and you ruined her life. Do you know how many dates I’ve turned down or bailed on, how many times I’ve been afraid to leave my room because I hear your voice, how many nightmares I’ve had that have kept me up at night because of what you did to me? The answer.. Every single day since November, 1st 2017.
You never had any rights to my body, my body doesn’t belong to you no matter what I am wearing or even if I am wearing nothing at all my body is not yours and you have no rights to it. You say you don’t realize what you were doing and how you were in the wrong even though I told you multiple times no while you still persisted, called me a tease and did it anyways. I will not let you play the victim here because you aren’t the victim I am and I will not take blame for what you did to my body.
Even still with everything that you did to me everyone was still on your side so not only was I take advantage of, scared and anxious, I was also alone or at least that is how it felt.
Everyone was worried that I would ruin your life if I pressed charges, did any of them stop and think about how this would affect my life?
No, instead they all just blamed my mental health, stopped talking to me and left me in the dust to deal with this all on my own… and I wasn’t ready for that as much as I don’t want to admit it I really needed them and I try really hard not to need people.
Eventually, they all came back and it was as if nothing had happened, they all pretended that none of it ever happened.
Well lucky for them because I can’t just pretend and forget that this happened because it is something that I will have to live with for the rest of my life something that is going to always follow me and make an impact on how I act around guys. All I wanted was for one person to understand me and to be on my side because I know my feelings were valid, I know what happened that night and no one can tell me otherwise.
Here I am a month and a half later and I’m starting to do okay, I can see you on campus now without my heart speeding up and my body going into panic mode, I can sleep through the night without the nightmares…. sometimes.
When all's said and done this is your fault, take responsibility and own up to your mistakes. I hope you learn from this and that this NEVER happens to another girl, I hope the next girl you bring home isn’t taken advantage of because NONE of us owe you our bodies or anything else.
We as women do not owe you anything and this goes both ways I can only write from my perspective though. We don't owe you that goodnight kiss, we don't owe you our bodies, we don't owe you anything.
Women nowadays have to worry about their safety way too much, we should not have to come out without ME TOO stories, we as a society need to stop promoting rape culture and stop blaming the victim. Rape is a serious thing that happens everyday all over the world, so stop it and remember that we don't owe you ANYTHING!!