Manic Panic... at the Disco? | The Odyssey Online
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Manic Panic... at the Disco?

Just Kidding, Fuck That Band!

N.A. Albertson
Mar 08, 2017
Saint Paul, Minnesota
30
Manic Panic... at the Disco?
The Decline of Western Civilization

Everything is shifting. Can you feel it? It's like everything is falling apart. Like we're going to have to find a foothold to grab ahold of the rubble. Like we are going to have to pick ourselves up and dust off. Like we are going to have to have a steady supply of safety pins to collect our discombobulated parts and attach ourselves back to ourselves.

The resurgence of "Trickle Down Reaganomics" feels more like watching rich, failing assholes who manage to fall up as we break down. Where is the goodness in people?

Oh yeah, all around us... Like, I have never felt like a capital P patriot until this whole Trump deal. When you can reality TV watch someone dismantle your whole country it's super disheartening. But, you can still see in the marches that we are fighting, and that we are fighting for A GOOD COUNTRY FOR EVERYONE. Why does it seem like its so hard for people to want a good country/world for everyone here?

Oh, yeah... It's because some people are afraid of losing what they have. Somehow, the idea that spreading the wealth means that we go without? Like, "I AM SO AFRAID THAT I WILL LIVE IN A WORLD WHERE I AM FORCED TO DRINK CONTAMINATED WATER AND THEN MY BRITA FILTERS WON'T BE ON SALE!"

Yeah, dude. You sound like that. You, like Dennis Leary are an asshole. We are all probably assholes.

Assholes who need hair that reflects the revolution in our hearts but not the sitting on the bed, binge-watching all of the protests on CNN, while internalizing our own hypocrisy. That kind of hair!

For that, I recommend Manic Panic , preferably a few years old, that you embrace from the bottom of an oft-forgotten bin of hair products. You can wildly slick it in your hair and then the jarring sight of yourself in the mirror will make you feel alive enough to make you feel like you are actually a part of the whole viva la revolution, BABY!

Addendumb: Assholes can't make endorsements except for anal bleach. While hair dye is sort of the same I wouldn't recommend Manic Panicing your asshole. But as an asshole I can't tell you what to do.


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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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