I try not to discuss politics with friends or family when I know we disagree. I personally hate confrontation but when my beliefs are questioned I don’t stand down. For me, feminism and what it stands for is a leading influence in my life, so when it is questioned or misinterpreted in front of me I almost can’t stop myself from being, “that annoying feminist girl.” So when one man I know accused Beyonce of being “anti feminist” obviously it was about to go down.

“She isn’t doing women any good dressing the way she does on stage. She shouldn’t need her tits to get people to come to her concerts. If anything she’s setting back the feminist movement. You know who actually does empower women? Adele. She covers up and let’s her music speak for itself.” Okay so, first of all: no. Second of all: neither Beyonce’s nor Adele’s clothing have anything to do with their feminist agenda and if you can’t see that then you’re literally missing the entire feminist agenda.

I think we can all agree that Beyonce was never famous just because she has a fantastic body. She has a beautiful voice, unrivaled stage presence, and has mastered audio as well as visual album work. So why does it matter that she shows off her body? She has a pretty dang good one. It’s a shame that how a grown woman chooses to dress can discount years of hustle and hard work as well as her talents and achievements.

The attitude that his statement came from is exactly the kind that feminism wished to change. The idea that a woman’s value can change with her clothes is ridiculous. We cannot continue to base the amount of respect we give a women on the amount of her skin we can see. The whole point is that she, as well as any other female, should be respected and valued as the sum of their entire being regardless of if they are wearing a tank top or a turtleneck. Since when did we as women have to meet certain conditions to be respected? When did we decide to allow men to give us respect when they feel like we earned it?

When I voiced these ideas to him he just laughed and said he disagreed. That yes, indeed the decency with which you treat a woman can change based on her clothes. That really puzzled me. I ended the conversation when he, as a male, began explaining feminism to me. I just couldn’t take it. It was almost laughable to me. The idea that my argument for feminism was being dismissed because it wasn’t a man’s version of feminism! What got me even more was the music he decided to play after this-- songs sung by male rappers that only refer to women as hoes. So let me get this straight… It’s not the guys who call women sluts but it is in fact Beyonce with her female body ruining feminism and settings us back? Wow, thanks for clearing that up for me.

But really here’s the bottom line. It’s not that he can’t have an opinion of feminism or that he as a male can't have valued input on inequality. That’s not the case at all-- feminism is for everyone because it benefits everybody. Feminism is about encouraging girls to support other girls instead of view them as competition. It is about making “being feminine” something that isn’t viewed as weak. It is about allowing boys to show just as much emotion as girls without being told to “man up.” Men have a place in the feminist movement as allies. Men can be feminists too and fully support women and their independance.

All in all we should all be feminists. Down with the patriarchy ;)