"Men can't get raped! Don't be ridiculous!"
"Did you get off? Then it's not rape!"
"But was she hot dude?"
"You got raped by a guy? You're gay?!"
Every day we see new reports of women coming forward about their sexual harassment stories. Rape, groping, catcalling, being forced upon. People coming forward makes us feel empowered to come forward ourselves. In fact, here in Cleveland, calls to our rape crisis center increased dramatically during Dr. Ford's testimony.
We are in the midst of a glorious social movement, exposing those who have kept us silent for years. Women telling their stories about things that happen too often but are quieted. Communities are coming together to tell women that they are safe, that they can tell us, that we will believe them.
So why are we not doing the same thing for men that were raped, groped, catcalled, and were forced upon? Why in the world is there such a ridiculous double standard for this?
Male rape is not something that is uncommon. In fact, 1 in 71 men are survivors of rape.
Sit in a big lecture. Statistically, one of the men in the room has been raped. In fact, 1 in 16 men has been assaulted while in college. These are real statistics. I'm not sitting here making these up.
This is such a pertinent issue, so why the Hell are we not talking about this?!
Why are we not giving men the light of day to speak out about the things that have happened to them as well?
This new age of feminism is doing so many amazing things all over the world. I am so blessed to be alive during a time of total empowerment of women. But we can't just ignore things that also happen to men.
Men that have been raped, I believe you. You can talk to me always. I will not question you until you want to burst. You are valid and your experience was horrible. If I could take away your pain, I would.
This does happen. I am so happy that women are getting the attention that they need, but we need to remember that we with the ovaries are not the only ones this happens too. What about transgender individuals? What about gender fluid individuals?
This happens to people of all walks of life.
Our best shot to put an end to the relentless cycle of rape culture is to join together against this.
The only reason rape happens is rapists. It isn't about how much they were drinking, what they were wearing, how they were looking at you. Rapists are the cause of rape.
It is NEVER the victim's fault. This goes for everyone.
And what the Hell is up with this idea that if a man orgasms while he's being raped that it wasn't really rape? Did he want to engage in sexual activity with that other person? No? Oh, then it's FUCKING RAPE!
There is no asterisk next to rape that leads to a footnote about how male rape is different. We have to start listening to men who have also been raped.
Rape is rape is rape is rape.
And survivors deserve our attention, love, respect, and protection, no matter their gender. We believe you.
Rape survivor resources:
National Sexual Assault Hotline- 1-800-656-HOPE
In the Cleveland area: Cleveland Rape Crisis Center
If you have been raped, always call 911 first!
Any local emergency department: rape kit testing, general wellness exam, psychological support