If you’re a millennial, you’ve been hammered over the head senseless with the importance of networking. And if you’re not an overachiever or outgoing or absurdly driven and extroverted, you may just have no idea how to actually do that. You’ve constantly been told that the only way you’ll move forward in life is to know people and to be able to climb the ladder. But what does networking mean?

I want you to think of networking as a very easy and manageable task. My advice is to keep a list of email addresses and contacts. Organize them by priority on who’s actually relevant or helpful, and who you can actually get feedback from. When you meet someone, you don’t have to sell yourself. It’s not an interview, you’re not asking for a job (yet). You’re not being judged. If anything, you need to make that person want to help you. Tell them that you’re in need of some direction and advice and you’re interested in their field (even if you’re not). Ask them what they do. That’s called an informational interview, and it’s incredibly useful. People like helping people, they like selling their life path, they like feeling important. If you show that interest, they’ll link up with you and your life will be ten times easier.

Once you get their email, just shoot them a quick message. Thank them for their contact and ask them if they’d be willing to offer some sort of wisdom. If you’re able to, ask them to lunch or if they’re not in the area, ask them if they’d be willing to pencil you in for a call. I know, that may seem daunting to try to talk to a total stranger or acquaintance for an hour, but I promise, people want to help you, and they will make it easy on you once you pass that initial contact stage. Before that meeting, write down some questions, ask them to look at your resume, have some targeted, sector specific questions. My bet is that 90% of the time you’re with them, they’ll be the one speaking. Your job is to get them to keep it up, and maybe convince them that you’re interested and that they could be helpful. If they’re not, then ask them for more contacts, then repeat.

Okay, but now what? Or what if you can’t set up a meeting with that person? It’s okay. But keep a list. Keep a folder somewhere filled with acquaintances in various, random, and diverse fields. Name dropping is incredibly useful. Once you have this, make a goal, like to contact one person a week, even if it’s a simple email, or even have lunch. Make it a habit. Even more, try to expand that list. Try to find one person and get their contact information. Then, try to find the person they mentioned, or google their profession and see who else you know. Utilize that alumni list! Alumni of your school are so underutilized and so many love to help those who went to their school. Plus, they’re easy to cold call (or email).

What did I do? I received an opportunity to do an internship. Even if my mentor wasn’t there, his colleagues were. I was able to set up informational interviews, and get a little direction. One important part was that it helped me learn what I didn’t want to do. Just by hearing someone else’s experience, you can see if you’d actually be happy trying to sit in their chair. Every time someone gave me their email, I taped it to my wall in a web, showing the connections, who knew whom, who might actually help and who I really didn’t need to contact, but I may need to someday. Even those people who random friends and family told me to call, they went up there, and some were more relevant than others. That’s okay. I now have their name, and if I’m smart, they’ll see my face and know who I am, and maybe help expand my web. In that, I now have a bigger support system, further access to areas I didn’t know existed, and people who generally will be helpful in shaping my career.

So, please, don’t be afraid that you’re annoying someone. Please don’t feel that you’re too introverted to ask for help. Don’t feel like they’ll never be helpful. But also, don’t be overwhelmed by all the names and people. Don’t feel like your future depends on one person. Give it time, recognize that it will take half your life to develop even a small network of people. Don’t make it the thing you stress about and fear and feel like every opportunity in your future is based upon knowing people. But, when you have the time, and when you feel ready to add an extra page to that address book, reach out, and build your web.