Making peace with your past.
Making peace with your past is essential for growth. I believe this may have to do with a lot of depression cases. Depression is constantly living in the past and the inability to feel that joy in the present. I know this is not the cause of every person's depression. Depression is about as wide ranged as the number of hairs on our head. Making peace with your past is not the solution to all your problems, but it sure can come with a lot of freedom. I am also not saying this is the cure to your depression, to make peace with your past. Everyone is different and experiences it differently. I think everyone will experience some sort of depression in their lives, some are just better at coping than others. I digress.
In order to move on with your life, I think it is healthy to talk about what has happened to you in your life with people you trust. So many times I have shared my story with others just to hear "My uncle has dealt with that" or "That happened to my mom" or so on. You are never alone! I can promise you that this story you are carrying along with you, someone else can relate and can understand. You'll never know if you aren't open and honest with those around you.
It's hard.
I'm not gonna lie and say it's easy to open up to others. For about 18 years of my life, I was a very closed off person. I was very much of a people pleaser.. I just wanted everyone to like me. But this life we live is not fair. You could be the nicest person on this planet and cater to every single person's needs and still someone is going to say that you're selfish. Get where I'm going with that? Don't let others define you.
In this life, you are going to meet all kinds of different people. Some are going to be the kindest souls with such positive energy and others are going to feel like they sucked the energy right out of you. Don't let those energy suckers steal your kindness. Stay you. Stay kind. Those same energy suckers may even try to define you as a person with words that are deceptively unkind. Don't listen. Those people are searching for what you have and coming up short so in turn, they want you to be just as miserable as they are.
Letting go of these labels that have been put on you throughout your life is a tricky but an eye opening experience. Here's the secret to success: You get to decide who you are. Isn't that awesome?? This life is YOURS. You can change your hair color, style, the place you live, and you can even change your name if you don't like it.
You can't change the past.
I don't know what's happened to you in your past, and I'm so so sorry if someone has broken you down. I'm sorry if things have happened to you that you have not shared with anyone. I'm so sorry.
But you are strong. You are still here to read this article right now. You survived. You are so awesome for that alone. Go you.
These things that happen to us, we have no control over. But what we do have control over is what we do with what happens to us.
You can choose to keep it to yourself, and that's fine. To each his own. Or you can share your story with someone you trust.
And maybe, just maybe, someone has a similar story as you. They listen to you. They cry with you. They laugh with you. And they share their story with you. And then they open up to others about themselves, all because you were open with them. And before you know it there is this chain reaction that involves love and breaks the chain of shame.
I am not proud of things I have done in my past. I have hurt others intentionally and unintentionally. I have not been the person I would have been proud of when I was younger. But this all changed when I told someone I trusted how I was feeling.
It changed my entire life when I started living for Christ and stopped living for myself.
It can change your life, too.
---Don't stop reading just because I mentioned Jesus. Please, just hear me out---
Jesus Christ wants to take away your shame from your past. He does not want you to live with that everyday. You are so much more than your past and what people say about you. This is demonstrated in Luke 7:34. The religious rulers called Jesus Christ a glutton and a drunk. This is far from the truth. Many may interpret this verse wrong and think that it is okay to be those things, but that is a wrong interpretation. Jesus was anything but concerned with things of this world, except for you and me. Because of the lost people he hung out with (I believe this to be a metaphor about you and me--we are all lost sheep, and he is like our Shepherd) Jesus was labeled this way. He had one purpose here: to save us all from our sin and the death we deserve. Jesus was not concerned with "partying it up" on Earth. He was focused on his sole purpose here.
Jesus still lives today. He lives inside of each and everyone of us. You just have to let him in. He knows every part of you, even the darkest parts. He loves you anyway. He's not going to force you to love him or even acknowledge the fact that he exists. That's your decision. It's also your decision if you want freedom or to be enslaved by shame and regret. Jesus always forgives. Always loves. Always triumphs over evil.
The love I have experienced from those who understand me, and love me and Jesus is indescribable. I have felt joy in ways I never knew existed when I let Him in. Thank you Jesus.
LB