How To Make Friends As An Adult | The Odyssey Online
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Friendships

8 Things To Remember When You're Trying To Make Friends As An Adult

Remember to stay open, remain confident, and start small.

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8 Things To Remember When You're Trying To Make Friends As An Adult

Sometimes, it can seem like everyone's found their place while you're stuck drifting, without a set group of friends. Some people like it that way, but others don't like the uncertainty. Spring semester has barely started, so if you're looking for new friends, don't feel like it's too late to meet new people and find a good group.

1. Don't quit!

You always hear that clubs are a great way to find friends, and don't be afraid to join a new organization. In general, most groups won't care when you come in, though it's important to find out beforehand. However, remember that not all groups are geared towards meeting often enough to actually make friends with those around you. Make sure you're always trying something that you have interest in, and if your first try doesn't have ideal results, don't quit at it. Keep trying!

2. Make sure that you're leaving yourself open

It's easy to get discouraged when you feel like you have been trying without rewards for so long. Don't let that dissuade you. Things are always about the effort you put into them. Don't let opportunities pass you by.

3. Stay confident

You attract more people to you when you feel better about yourself and who you are as a person. When you come off as thriving and self-possessed, other defining features become minuscule in comparison. Self-worth starts within. Others can tell if you're just looking for external validation.

4. Don't come off too strong, but don't dilute yourself to appeal to others

It's hard to find a good balance of being palatable and being a strong character. Don't misrepresent yourself to other people just because they might like you more. It won't be good for you in the long run, when they realize that you've been faking, and, anyway, people, in general, can tell that something's off if you're pretending to be someone you're not. Still, also remember that people tend not to become best friends right away. Take it slow, and enjoy the journey it takes to get there.

5. Pay attention to others

When you're searching for friendship, it can become easy to focus only on what you could be doing and how you're coming off. Don't forget about the world around you. When you're taking notice of how others act and feel, it will be easier to actually connect with them as people.

6. Start small

Start with small conversations or invites to study, instead of more intense friend activities. Don't expect too much too fast, and be OK with taking smaller steps to invite others' interests.

7. Don't compare college to high school

You may have had a million friends by the time you graduated. You also probably spent years in that place, with the same people around you constantly. College is inherently different, so of course, it's going to be harder to form relationships that fast. You're going to make yourself miserable if all you do is think about how it used to be.

8. Stop for a second

Take a deep breath. Don't get stressed out over your social life. Experiences are not always equivalent, and just because someone told you that life needs to be one way, that doesn't mean it can't go another. You won't be in this place forever. You're going to be fine.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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