Being alone can be great. There's the blissful silence, the judgment-free environment where you can do as you please and the enlightening opportunity to just focus on getting to know yourself without having to worry about anyone else's wants and needs. But… we are social beings so sometimes, being alone is lonely.
For some people, loneliness is just the impetus they need to get them up and motivated to socialize. But for others, the shy, awkward, people-hating, social anxiety ridden, (insert other afflictions here), it's easy to get stuck in that loneliness.
Here are a few easy but quality social activities that can help quell those annoying lonely pangs.
1. Group singing
Whether it's choir or a concert or a church worship jam session, there is something truly magical being a part of a mass, collective voice. There's this sense of belonging and purpose and community that, under normal social circumstances, is hard to achieve. While you have no relationship whatsoever with the people singing beside you, in those moments, somehow, you are strangely connected to people and things just feel right.
2. Animals
Animals aren't people but, having a living breathing thing so excited to see you sure feels good so I'm counting it. There's nothing better than coming home after a long day of noise and insignificant small talk to a cute little face beaming with joy for no other reason than that he is happy to see you.
3. Books
Not to sound too nerdy, but books can open new worlds. If you really get engrossed in a fiction book and let yourself connect with the characters, you'll be amazed at how real everything can feel. It's amazing what a little imagination can do.
And if fiction is not your thing, biographies are another great way to get sucked into another world. In some ways, it can be an even better form of connection than actually socializing as you can experience someone being relatively vulnerable and open with you in a safe way without having to be vulnerable in return.
Another great nonfiction route is reading books that help you understand yourself as well as provide social skills tips that you can relate to. When you're friendlessness is hitting you hard and you are so sure this is how it'll always be for you, learning both about yourself and skills to help you be more comfortable being yourself around others can give you the hope you need to keep trying.
But...
What if you don't have or like animals and in person stuff is just a little too much for you? Let me draw your attention to the world wide web.
4. Online communities
No, I'm not talking about those sites with trained listeners or those text/call in line numbers you can look up if you need someone to talk to. I'm sure those can be great for people who are really in the depths of loneliness. Chronic loneliness is no joke and can really affect your health (check out "Loneliness Matters" by Hawkley, et. al.) If you are debilitatingly lonely, throw that pride aside and check those resources out. They are popular for a reason.
But... if you're not THAT bad, I imagine using them can make you feel even lonelier as you're basically admitting that you have no one to talk to and you have to rely on "trained listeners" instead of friends and family like a "normal person" which may cause you to other yourself as "not normal" which, in turn, adds to that loneliness feedback loop and AHH *GASPING INHALATION AFTER THAT ANXIETY RIDDEN SENTENCE*.
So, instead, it might be a good idea to look into online communities that are purely social. The first one that comes to mind is Reddit but I'm sure a Google search can reveal plenty more.
While the Internet is known for having bullies and trolls, there are also many kind people that will talk to you, not because they are trained listeners, but because they are actually interested in you and what you have to say. And that can be a real confidence boost.
At some point, you may want to have more close, intimate relationships with people but in the meantime, I hope these ideas can help you enjoy your antisocial ways sans all the loneliness.
