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You'll Need To Make Certain Choices In Order To Make Your Relationship Better

Love is sacrificing because it is a choice, so choose to stay through sickness and health.

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You'll Need To Make Certain Choices In Order To Make Your Relationship Better
Shelbi Renaldo, Owner of Shelbi Raines Photography

A couple weeks ago, I had to suffer through a nasty stomach bug. After vomiting and a shot in the butt, it turned out I wasn't actually dying. Spoiler alert.

And even though I was being a big baby about being sick, Emily took wonderful care of me. And it got me thinking, people say "In Sickness and In Health" when they get married, but do we mean it?

The more I think about it, the more I realize we say "I love you" to our boyfriends/girlfriends too soon. We use our feelings of ecstasy that we get early in a relationship to say that we love a person, but I don't believe that love is defined by feelings.

My parents and my girlfriend have all shown me beautiful examples of how to love through sickness and health, and what real love is.

My step-dad has Type 1 diabetes and my mom has been able to love and support him through his disease. Granted, if she didn't love him because he had diabetes that would be extremely shallow, but she knew going into the relationship that he had diabetes and still chose him anyway. It caused her some lifestyle changes, and some sleepless nights because his sugar would drop, but she kept pursuing him.

My step-mom was diagnosed with Thyroid cancer a couple years ago, and she had to have her whole thyroid removed. For those who don't know, the thyroid is one of the central organs in your body for hormone control, so not having changes your hormones; which changes your moods.

This meant that for the first couple months after her surgery, she was almost a completely different person. But my dad still loved her anyway. We have all adapted, and she has done remarkably well coping without a thyroid, but the fact still remains that love is more than an "I do".

I think where our culture gets it wrong is we think "I'll love them if...". However, that is the thing about love, there are no "if's". That dangerous mentality implies that love must be earned. We wouldn't dare say that our kids need to earn our love, but we practice this mentality with our spouses and boyfriends/girlfriends and that is toxic.

Christ did not make us earn salvation or love, and if Christian's are supposed to act like Christ, why on earth would we make people have to earn our love?

Emily showed her love to me by sitting with me at the doctors, and making sure I was as comfortable as possible between vomiting sessions. She sacrificed her day for me, and put up with my moodiness until I got better.

In order for love to be genuine, it must endure trials. Whether those trials are a stomach bug or a life altering disease, love must remain for it to be genuine. We must mean what we say when say, "In sickness and in health" if we want out love to last.

That means sacrifices have to be made for the other person on a daily basis. Love is sacrificing because it is a choice, so choose to stay through sickness and health.

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