Four years of adventures, mistakes, and growth. High school brings many people together but the sad fact of the matter is after high school, most friendships grow apart due to college, jobs, and other various reasons.
Not only is it depressing to not see your friends every day anymore, it's downright hard to handle. Although you'll make new friends and meet people just as great, that doesn't mean you won't miss the memories and being able to be with people who you became so important to you. So what do you do?
It isn't easy and it takes time, but there a few things you can do to keep connected and maintain friendships despite the distance that may try to pull you apart. Remember that sometimes friendships end after high school and that's okay, but don't let that stop you from giving it a shot.
1. Commitment to one another
First and foremost, make sure that both sides are committed. Kind of like a long distance relationship, both ends need to ensure one another they want to keep a bond no matter what. If you and your friend are willing to at least put forth the effort to remaining friends, then you know it won't be a one-sided friendship from the get-go.
Commitment also means taking the time to MAKE that commitment. Move time around to ensure to keep that friendship stable. Do what you can to ensure to your friend that you haven’t forgotten them or that you’re still thinking about them.
2. Make a plan
Devise a plan to help maintain that friendship: whether it be texting each other every day, going on visit trips over here and there, or even planning set times when returning home to spend time with each other. Have a guideline of what your ideal friendship will be like while you both are separated to create awareness of expectations.
Unfortunately, sometimes these ideas and plans will fall through and not work. Some days may be crazy and either end will not be able to fulfill their own end of the friendship. But that does not mean to give up, it just means trying even harder for the next time.
3. Communicate often and regularly
As any relationship of any kind requires communication but a long-distance relationship requires even extra communication. In this type of situation, communication is critical to maintaining a healthy and happy friendship. Whether it be big or small, just make sure you interact with one another at a good rate.
Again, some days will be harder than others to communicate. If you are aware it is going to be a busy day, week, or even month then take the opportunity to let your friend know so they don't jump to conclusions. If you are unaware make sure you let them know as soon as possible and remember to reassure you have not forgotten about them.
4. Be Understanding with each other
Nothing in life goes exactly as planned so be sure to keep this in mind when having a long distance friendship. Do not get angry or upset with one another when things blow up or fall apart. Remember what's important and stick to it.
Also, do not get upset when either one of you makes new friends. It can be difficult due to a feeling of replacement but remember no one can ever take the spot that you once had. Each friendship is unique in its own individual way and nothing or no one can match that.
And don’t let distance stop that friendship from what is was before. If either of you are stressed or need to vent, be there. Be understanding even if you have no idea what is truly going on, be the friend you always were.
5. Acceptance that lives goes without our presence
Along with understanding, it's important to maintain acceptance between friendships, especially in long-distance cases. As life goes on people change, some for the better or for the worse, but don't let that ruin a strong friendship. Stick with one another and give guidance when needed, but also let everyone live their lives.
We can only grow from experience so let each other learn and change as time goes on. Accept everyone for who they are and do not make comparisons to past. The important factor is being a friend no matter what and helping each other move on, not backward.
Leaving friends is never easy, and it never will be. But these are just some simple ways to ensure that those amazing bonds stay through everything and anything. Because at the end of the day, you only have each other.
