Over the course of a friendship you have laughed together, cried, argued, celebrated, danced, went out, and have established memories that will never be forgotten by the two of you. Friendship, like any relationship, has the potential to blossom in to a lifelong friendship if the friendship is handled with a lot of love and care.
Unlike family, friendship has the advantage of selective choosing. A friend is a person that you choose to be in your circle. There are a few simple ways to make sure that a friendship lasts.
Don’t Sweat It
The worst thing you can do is try to make something work. A friendship should be as casual as your friend counterpart. Some of my most loved friends are the ones that I don’t talk to every day.
Life evolves on a daily basis, full of changes, not only for you, but your friend as well. Maybe at one point you guys used to talk every day, and now you don’t. That isn’t necessarily a bad thing, and it doesn’t mean the friendship is ending. It just means that whenever you do talk to your friend, it should be like nothing has changed; the reasons why you chose this person to be your friend has not changed.
So don’t sweat it if you guys don’t talk as much as you used to, instead, just embrace the moments that you guys do talk! You’ll be much happier with the friendship, and it will continue to thrive
Just Speak Up
No need to be melodramatic. I’ve found it easiest to just put everything out on the table the moment you see that there is a problem. If you don’t like something that your friend did, then speak up. Of course wait until the time is right, no need to cause a scene. It is very important to talk out feelings instead of letting them fester and build up until you snap at your friend. They’d probably think the same thing, “why didn’t s/he tell me that when it happened.”
This is also important because your friend might not even acknowledge their wrong doing, or they could continue to do whatever it is that is bothering you, because you haven’t spoken up yet. Ultimately, if you let feelings fester, it could create a divide in the friendship.
Never Forget the Good Times
If ever in a dispute, remember that you chose this person to be in your life for a reason. It could be for a number of reasons, you both have a lot in common, your friend is smart and makes you think about situations from outside of the box, or they bring out a side of you that you wouldn’t be able to do on your own. The list goes on.
So many times a friendship can fail because in the heat of the moment of the argument some things can be said that can really hit below the belt. Think about it, this person knows you, knows what makes you happy, what makes you angry; this person knows how to get a reaction out of you. Of course when you get in to an argument it hurts.
That is why it’s important to think about all of the good times you’ve had. How would life be without your friend? How was life before s/he entered your life? It is important to understand that anything can be said during an argument, but that should not define the friendship at all!
Overview
You have to remember that a friend is a person you want to be in your life, a person that you understand and vice versa. You guys will grow together, learn together, fight with each other, but at the end of the day, your friend means something to you.
A true friendship shouldn’t be so easily replaced or left behind. Remember that it is important to realize that the dynamic of a friendship could changes, when it comes to how often you guys talk, but that makes it all worthwhile when you finally do see your friend and catch up.
Also, never let unresolved issues ruin something you’ve built. A friendship has to be built, as a team, not torn down. These really simple tips can make a friendship evolve into a lifetime.
