The guy's in the house have called him the Luke-ness-monster, a psychopath, a compulsive liar, but what I haven't really heard them call him- and what is most evident to me- is that he is a narcissist.
In the last episode, Hannah Brown asks Luke P., "Why is it so hard with us?"..... I'd like to take a second to explain why it is, in fact, so hard with them. And it all points back to narcissism, or more specifically, narcissistic personality disorder.
Let's, first, start off with a psychological definition of narcissism, or narcissistic personality disorder: "narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) are grandiosity, a lack of empathy for other people, and a need for admiration. People with this condition are frequently described as arrogant, self-centered, manipulative, and demanding."
They may also have grandiose fantasies and may be convinced that they deserve special treatment. A look into narcissism will also tell you that "their grandiosity increases greatly and that they are easily angered when they don't receive the attention and admiration that they consider their birthright."
A list of the DSM-5 symptoms of NPD, as well as explanations for why Luke P. exhibits most-if not all of these, are as follows:
1. A grandiose sense of self-importance.
Luke P. has countless times demonstrated this symptom. He believes that he is the best for Hannah and that no one in the house feels the way he feels about her. During the Luke P. and Luke S. fiasco when Hannah was trying to figure out why none of the men in the house liked Luke P., he tries telling her that "In any other situation people love me."
This raised a red flag with Hannah, and she tried to make him understand how "boastful" that sounded. To this, he had not much of a reply other than "it's been hard" or examples of things the other guys in the house had done to him. There was no empathy, no emotion, and Hannah could tell. (see number 7)
2. Preoccupation with fantasies of unlimited success, power, brilliance, beauty, or ideal love.
Ideal love is the one I will touch on in this. He, himself, has a dark past, yet expects Hannah to be absolutely pure and fit his mold of "someone he wants to spend his life with". He failed to see Hannah's struggle to gain ground within their relationship, idealizing it to all be fine until Hannah expressed her concern.
When Hannah did express her concern, Luke turned into what she describes as "robotic" and basically just saying anything (and nothing at all) to twist the story, and manipulate Hannah into seeing something that isn't there (empathy and understanding). Somehow, though, she really seems into him. He uses this instant connection that he has with Hannah to manipulate her time and time again rather than actually connecting.
3. Belief that one is special and can only be understood by or associate with special people or institutions.
This one is less evident, but I do see where Luke P is only concerned and believes that he and Hannah know their relationship and the person that he is. He is less concerned with the other men in the house seeing his real colors because he knows he can twist the wording and story to Hannah, confusing her, and leaving her more apt to let it slide- yet again.
4. A need for excessive admiration.
Luke not only needs excessive admiration from Hannah, but the men in the house. Admiration also comes in the form of attention- which we all know Luke loves as he time after time makes every episode about him. Whenever he believes the attention is off of him, or everything is going "seemingly" okay, he has to create some sort of dramatics to bring the spotlight back to him.
5. A sense of entitlement (to special treatment).
Luke P. expects special treatment in almost every aspect. He feels entitled to Hannah's time over the other men in the house. He made this evident when he interrupted several conversations- on separate occasions- to steal her away. He also feels entitled to her body which he describes as a "temple"... Yet from the first episode, we learned that Luke himself has not treated his body as a temple as he would like Hannah to. Which is unfair.
When Hannah confronts Luke about their conversation concerning the naked bungee jump date, she makes it clear that he was disrespectful, and is, in fact, not her husband, and does not own her body. Luke then gaslights her and makes it seem that he didn't mean what she thought he meant, expecting special treatment for being "open" when he was just being manipulative and problematic.
6. Exploitation of others.
Ah. The Luke S. and Luke P. situation. Luke P. straight up exploited a conversation with Luke S. and told Hannah that he didn't believe that he was here for the right reasons to try and gain an upper-hand after body-slamming and kneeing Luke. S. in the head during a rugby game in Scotland.
When Luke S. confronted Luke P. and asked him to clear the air, which Luke P. agreed to- but instead further exploited the situation and instead of clearing the air, made Luke S. look even worse by telling her, "The last person I want to talk about right now is Luke S., but he came up to me asking me to put in a good word for him to you, which I have no business concerning myself with. What I want you to know is, what I told you the other night about him, my opinion about him being here for the right reasons, although he tried to talk me into thinking that he is here for the right reasons, nothing has changed."
7. A lack of empathy.
He makes it very clear that "all is fair in love and war" is one of his mottoes. He doesn't care about the other men in the house's feelings, and views this as a competition rather than a chance or opportunity and tries to get the upper-hand no matter who he steps on in the process.
8. Envy of others or the belief that one is the object of envy.
Luke P. can't hear about any other dates that Hannah goes on because he is self consumingly jealous, or envious, of all the other men's relationship with her. He even admits this envy to Hannah and doesn't want to hear about the fun times and experiences she's having with the other men in the house. If he truly loved her, he knew what he signed up for, and should be happy that she's experiencing these new places to the fullest, as Tyler C. said.
9. Arrogant, haughty behavior or attitudes.
From the first group date, it's obvious that Luke P. is very arrogant. He knows he's attractive and even told us that he used this to his advantage while in college. Hannah even calls Luke out on this quality, "You're cocky and I don't like that," she says after he stated that he was "tired of waiting" to talk to her (hello entitlement).
Also, when under criticism, Luke P. is quick to anger and we see a few yelling outbursts and examples of this throughout the season. This kind of temperament when criticized or called out is also a telling symptom of NPD.
After reading this, I wanted to state that a person has to exhibit only five of these characteristics, present at early adulthood and across contexts, to be considered having a narcissistic personality disorder. I'm no psychologist, but I am a psychology major, so I'll let you make that determination for yourself.
It is very clear that Luke P. is an emotionally manipulative person. In an emotionally abusive, toxic relationship, the victim feels all the emotions Hannah is feeling. Crazy, helpless, confused, unsure of their own judgment, preoccupied with the "what if's". As someone who's been in a relationship like this, and experienced narcissistic abuse, it's honestly very triggering to watch Luke P. up on that screen.
While it is triggering to me, and likely many others, I felt that it was important to call attention to this, so that any other woman or man who may experience the beginnings of narcissistic abuse can take the steps to excuse themselves from the relationship before things get too deep.
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