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11 Things That Might Go Through A College Student's Head At A Family Holiday Gathering

"Oh, so you like Donald Trump Grandpa? Why don't I build a wall around you?"

Kendall Milton

Mar 28, 2016

Loyola Marymount University

11 Things That Might Go Through A College Student's Head At A Family Holiday Gathering

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1. Oh no, my grandma has that nostalgic gleam in her eye. Here comes one of her unfiltered stories. Time to look to the bottom of my wine glass for support.

"You kids think you invented everything, but your grandfather used to be a creature in the bedroom!"

2. Did my great uncle just say he supports Trump? Should I tell him its only because they both have the same "corn husk looking" comb over?

3. Shoot I'm really buzzed ... oh no I think I might be about to say I support Bernie. Feel the Bern, overly conservative relatives.

4. What am I planning to do in the future, you ask? Well, I plan on downing three more glasses of wine, and trying to survive this political conversation by making fun of it on Snapchat.

5. You mean like the after graduation future? I don't know but I found a building where the heat escapes from an outside vent. I figure with a nice sleeping bag it'll make a good place to sleep after I finish paying off student loans.

6. Do I have a boyfriend? No. The only man I see consistently is "The Bachelor" every Monday at 8 p.m., and even then I’m competing with 25 other women. All of whom he knows exist (he doesn't know I exist).

7. Do I really have to say grace? What if I mess up in front of my overly religious relatives? The only kind of Mary I’m interested in talking about comes with celery, and certainly isn’t the “Virgin” kind.

8. Thanks. I know I look "pretty' and "grown up." I better look f*%#$@ beautiful for the pain I’m enduring right now. My bulging stomach is desperately trying to break free of this sexist cage known as "panty hose."

9. I better eat more turkey, ooh and some of that pumpkin pie, so my stomach doesn’t get even more pissed at me.

10. Did my grandpa really just call homosexuality a trend? You know what's also a trend, and one that should stay in the 1920s? Flat cap hats like the one you're wearing...

11. Did my grandma really just ask me how to take a selfie? How does she know what a selfie is? I thought she thought a tweet was the sound her bird clock makes....

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11 Things That Might Go Through A College Student's Head At A Family Holiday Gathering

"Oh, so you like Donald Trump Grandpa? Why don't I build a wall around you?"

1. Oh no, my grandma has that nostalgic gleam in her eye. Here comes one of her unfiltered stories. Time to look to the bottom of my wine glass for support.

2. Did my great uncle just say he supports Trump? Should I tell him its only because they both have the same "corn husk looking" comb over?

3. Shoot I'm really buzzed ... oh no I think I might be about to say I support Bernie. Feel the Bern, overly conservative relatives.

4. What am I planning to do in the future, you ask? Well, I plan on downing three more glasses of wine, and trying to survive this political conversation by making fun of it on Snapchat.

5. You mean like the after graduation future? I don't know but I found a building where the heat escapes from an outside vent. I figure with a nice sleeping bag it'll make a good place to sleep after I finish paying off student loans.

6. Do I have a boyfriend? No. The only man I see consistently is "The Bachelor" every Monday at 8 p.m., and even then I’m competing with 25 other women. All of whom he knows exist (he doesn't know I exist).

7. Do I really have to say grace? What if I mess up in front of my overly religious relatives? The only kind of Mary I’m interested in talking about comes with celery, and certainly isn’t the “Virgin” kind.

8. Thanks. I know I look "pretty' and "grown up." I better look f*%#$@ beautiful for the pain I’m enduring right now. My bulging stomach is desperately trying to break free of this sexist cage known as "panty hose."

9. I better eat more turkey, ooh and some of that pumpkin pie, so my stomach doesn’t get even more pissed at me.

10. Did my grandpa really just call homosexuality a trend? You know what's also a trend, and one that should stay in the 1920s? Flat cap hats like the one you're wearing...

11. Did my grandma really just ask me how to take a selfie? How does she know what a selfie is? I thought she thought a tweet was the sound her bird clock makes....

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College is hard, but you will make it through.

1. You will have that special "college" look to you.

2. You will feel like an adult but also feeling like a child.

3. You will have classes that are just the professor reading from their lecture slides for an hour.

4. You will need to study but also want to hang out with your friends.

5. Coffee is your best friend.

6. You don't know what you're doing 99% of the time.

7. You will procrastinate and write a paper the night before it is due.

8. Money is a mythical object.

9. It is nearly impossible to motivate yourself to go to classes during spring.

10. The food pyramid goes out the window.

11. You will have at least one stress induced breakdown a semester.

12. Most lecture classes will bore you to tears.

13. You will not like all of your professors.

14. You will try to go to the gym... but you will get too lazy at some point.

15. When you see high school students taking tours:

16. You will try to convince yourself that you can handle everything.

17. Finals week will try to kill you.

18. You won't like everyone, but you will find your best friends sooner or later.

19. You actually have to go to class.

20. Enjoy it, because you will be sad when it is all over.

You are not alone.

XOXO, Gossip Girl.

HER WARDROBE:

HER LOVE LIFE:

Because we made it, and because high school seniors deserve to know what they're getting themselves into

1. The awkward hellos on move-in day.

2. Getting to know your roommate.

3. Attending your first class.

4. The good first experience with dining hall food.

5. Exploring the flaws on your campus.

6. Contemplating skipping a lecture.

7. Using college as your explanation for everything.

8. Finally finding dining hall food annoying.

9. Getting mad at your roommate.

10. Feeling like everyone else has it all figured out.

11. Feeling overwhelmed by finals.

College is not what everyone expects it to be.

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