I walk in the darkness, the campus in almost total silence. There is a cold breeze blowing onto my face, but I don't notice. There are deeper things on my mind. I reach the church, pulling open the large door and taking my place among the crowd of fellow students. They are here for the same reason I am: repentance.
For those of you outside Catholic or Christian tradition, last Wednesday was Ash Wednesday, the beginning of the season of Lent. Lent is the Church's time of absolution and abnegation. In the 40 days before Easter, we are called to turn away from the sins and temptations of the world and turn toward God and his path for our lives.
In Christian tradition, as believers we often give up something during Lent, either a worldly pleasure, such as chocolate, or a troubling vice, such as drinking or spending too much time online. The removal of this action or behavior (until Easter, usually) is to serve as a symbol of our penitence and dedication to God as we prepare for Jesus' Passion and Resurrection during Holy Week.
Being raised in a Catholic home, this act of "giving something up," for me at least, fell into the same nebulous trap that New Year's resolutions did; being grand, optimistic, and undefined. "I will use the computer less." The spirit may be quite willing, but the flesh and my willpower are rather weak. More often than not I would end up breaking this promise to myself and God, much to my guilt and regret. I suspect many people have this sort of trouble; not my sister though. She can and has gone without chocolate the entire season at least twice. You go, girl.
This desire to "give something up" for Lent seems to be rather pervasive in the Christian community. One alternative that my family discovered was to as well as, or even instead of giving something up, to do something that brings you closer to God. One year our whole family tried to say the rosary together. On an individual level, this concept of "doing something for God" has been much more successful; several of my behaviors, such as reading the Bible in the morning and keeping a prayer journal, have even stuck with me beyond the 40 days.
I feel this concept works well for me, so I'm doing it again this year. Over Christmas break, I feel I officially decided that becoming a writer was God's path for me. So, I decided to do a writing prompt every day this Lent, before I did any other fun activity. I brought the journal, which my sister had given me as a Christmas gift, with me to the Ash Wednesday service at 9 p.m. that night. After I had received my ashes, I quickly and carefully spread some onto the inside cover in the shape of a cross. It may be hard to keep my promise. I may even falter once or twice. But that's what this season is about. No matter what sins we accrue, God's grace is always there to help us back onto the path.
