I have an afro.
Okay, not a literal afro especially since my hair is long, but essentially...an afro. The twists and tangles of small and big curls came to me from my father's genes. And the wildness of it drives my mother crazy cause her hair is pin straight in nature. Highlights of my childhood include me sitting on the floor while she tugs my hair from above attempting to tame it. There was so much tangle spray and so much pain. I grew to hate the hair I was given.
As I got older, straighteners were widely common and the weekly hair tug-of-war became hair frying. It took at least an hour to get my hair into a form that would be seen as acceptable outside. My dad would always say that my mother was jealous of my big, thick hair, "she wish she had hair like you." Though it helped, the masking of what I was given would always hurt.
Fast forward years later, my heat damaged hair remains. A lot of the curls have diminished but the wide-reaching dimensions remain and I love it. I spent so much time hating myself and changing myself for the sake of vanity and others' perspectives that it was interfering into my own life.
Now, I refuse to hide the natural hair I was given in updos or braids if it's not straightened. I wear it loose and free and my dense hair keeps me warm like the wooliest scarf. There was never anything wrong with it.
Statistically, two women go in for an interview, one with straight and the other with curly hair--- the straight haired one is more likely to get the job. Even more so if her job includes public appearances. It's common for women within the entertainment business to get their hair straightened because many producers think that curly hair is wild and unpredictable, not knowing what it'll do on camera. Personally, I'd like to think that's a part of my charm, but also in the moment I'm unsure if I'd give in or not. It is hard to choose between a job and your self expression, but it shouldn't be.
Right now, I have no problem wearing my hair as is professionally. I'm so comfortably me like this and I feel that this should be the defining factor. The more comfort a person has about who they are, the more their personality will ring true to their character. We shouldn't have to change for anyone
