Growing up each of us have many close friends and for us lucky ones, those close friends stick with you all the way to adulthood. In my own personal experience I have had two really close friends stick with me, one of which is now my companion, my rock, the absolute love of my life.

I've known this boy since I was literally five years old. We've gone to school together from Kindergarten all the way through high school. Quite often we like to reflect on our collection of memories together and new ones come to mind everyday. In second grade we had this writing prompt and to this day I still have it saved. I was writing about who I was and what things meant the most to me. In the prompt I wrote that he was my best friend. Little did I know how much that one piece of writing would come to mean years later. In fifth grade we "dated" and I felt super cool because I had a designated spot next to him at the lunch table. He of course was the most popular which made me feel like I was on top of the world. There was one day when we were watching a movie and he was laying on my chest. I played with his hair but I felt so nervous because I liked him so much, I didn't want to scare him away. Of course our relationship didn't last. He let me go because his friend wanted a chance with me. I was crushed but I didn't give up. In sixth grade I wrote him a note asking if he wanted to date me again but he turned me down. I can't say I moved on but I pushed my feelings aside for quite some time. Towards the end of our eighth grade year we were super good friends but that was about it. We always made faces at each other from across the room and continued to compete in gym class...I never won but I surely tried. I've always been jealous of his athleticism...it's unfair but I love him for it. At our graduation that year I cried when I hugged him and I felt kind of sad because I didn't know how high school would go for either of us.

Well, we did make it to high school so that's a plus. I didn't have many classes with him until our junior and senior year. I do remember during our freshman and sophomore year we would still talk quite often and we would both smile at each other in the halls. Junior and senior year we had English class together and guess who helped who with homework. Me, being the amazing best friend, made sure he had the answers for the homework he never did on time. Senior year was probably the time when we both realized there were some feelings that remained from grade school but we refused to acknowledge them. I was always trying to convince him to take a picture with me at school just because and he played it off like he hated them so much. He'd purposely avoid me in the halls until I found him, it's actually pretty funny thinking about it now. Lots of people, including our close friends told us someday we would be together because they knew there was something more than just being best friends. I didn't want to believe it at the time, I couldn't picture us being together. I suppose I hadn't really thought about it until after graduation.

The entire summer after our high school graduation I'd always see him around town or out at a party. He was always the first person I went up to, the first person I would hug or take a picture with. I knew deep down there was something more but I still refused to believe it. At the end of that summer I was getting ready to leave for my first semester as an undergraduate and he was preparing for his journey in the United States Marine Corps. His birthday was about a week and a half before both of us had to start the new chapters in our lives. I remember going over that day and after spending some time with him I realized maybe I did want something more. The night before I left for college he came over and we had a long conversation in his car that night. We laughed so hard it hurt and I really didn't want to leave him behind.

So, the next chapter of our lives began. He went off to being his career in the Marines and I went off to college. I wrote him letters while he was in boot camp and I remembering checking my mailbox everyday in hopes that a new letter had arrived for me. When I went home for Thanksgiving break that was when I really started keeping in touch with his parents. I went over to visit them and I loved it more than anything. I felt right at home, as if I belonged there. He would be coming back home the beginning of December and I wanted to surprise him. The night he flew back to Vermont I waited at his house for him with his little brother until he arrived. Seeing him walk through the doors of his house was such a big relief and an overwhelming moment. I was so happy to see him again and boy oh boy did he look good. He was exhausted of course but he looked handsome as could be. That first hug was so special, I could tell from the tone in his voice that he was very happy to see me. From that moment on, our friendship had forever changed.

From that December to the following October we grew much closer on an intimate level. Each time he came home I always went over and visited although it always seemed to be super late at night. I couldn't complain though because I was able to see him. The months in between we talked often but not everyday. We also didn't have very meaningful conversations just small talk mostly. I enjoyed the small moments when I heard from him but I wanted more...I was too afraid to tell him that though. At some point out of the blue all of that changed. Our communication increased and we began talking everyday. We confided in each other more than ever. That Christmas break we spent a significant amount of time together. We hung out with each other's families more often and I was living for it. I love his family, they're some of the greatest people I have met. I'm so thankful to have them in my life. At the end of that vacation and his leave, I grew real sad. I bawled my eyes out the last night I saw him before he flew back to base because I knew he would soon be deploying. I was so emotional but I just really wanted my best friend to stay. That was the first time in my life I had ever felt such a strong ache in my body because I was longing for his comfort but I knew I had to let him go.

So...then his deployment came. I knew I was entirely in love with him at that point but I didn't know how to tell him that so I didn't. I hinted at it but I held back because I wasn't sure how he felt. I knew he didn't want anything serious because he had so much to focus on in the coming months. When we reached the end of his deployment I drove down to see him and I stayed for almost the entire month of August. Seven months without my best friend was extensive so of course I made sure I could stay longer than just a few days. We kind of spoiled ourselves with so much time together but it was more than worth it. I felt so content down there and in that time frame we realized a lot. We both came to the conclusion that we cared so much for each other and we couldn't picture our lives without one another. I suppose that's when we made everything official although it still seems so odd to me that it's my reality. Don't get me wrong, I am so grateful that things worked out how they did. I think what makes the situation so odd is that everyone called it way back in high school and then it actually happened. We honestly should've known...

Just recently I flew back down for the ball and leaving him behind tore my heart to pieces. I have cried every time I had to say goodbye for the time being, however this time around it was different. Both of our emotions got the best of us. It's hard to explain the way it feels. When we're together the whole world seems to stop and everything becomes so peaceful. All of my stress disappears for a little while. I've never felt so comfortable and content with a person before but when I'm in his arms I feel at home. There is nothing I crave more than his affection.

When I look into his eyes I can see the love he holds. His eyes light up the way the moon lights up the night on a starry night with no clouds in the sky. The light is in the darkness, so simple yet so beautiful. When he pulls me closer I can tell by his touch he feels content and he's happy. The small physical things speak volumes. I would do anything to make sure he feels okay in the world and that he's right where he needs to be. I know he isn't perfect but I love him unconditionally. He has a heart of gold and I believe he is capable of so many amazing things. I've always wanted to be someone's saving grace but truly he is mine and I hope that I am his.

I remember as I was growing up people always said long distance relationships were difficult and that most don't work out. I remember telling myself that I didn't think I could ever do it because the opinions of others had greatly influenced me. As I reflect back today, I wouldn't change my relationship for the world. The distance absolutely gets the best of both of us sometimes but the wait is always worth it. The excitement we both have when counting down the minutes until we are reunited can never compare to anything else. The love we have for one another is beyond belief, sometimes we can't even believe it. Leaving my best friend kills me every time and it never gets easier. Having to go through long periods of time without my companion by my side hurts so much. I feel like the life is being sucked out of me and it's almost difficult to breathe.

I look forward to the days in my future when I get to spend every day and night with him. I look forward to the days when I can say we finally made it. I look forward to when the waiting and all the heartache will ended and we reach the place in our lives that we have desired most. I've never been so sure of anyone but I am sure that I don't see my future with anyone else. A love like that comes once in a lifetime, I will cherish it forever.

Any relationship is difficult and the best relationships come at the most unexpected times and I wouldn't change mine for the world. I truly believe that if it wasn't for the military I wouldn't have fallen so madly in love in my childhood best friend. All the small moments and memories that led us to this point are so sentimental. Expect the unexpected in life, fight for what you want the most and never give up. Distance and time can never define love. Communication and trust are the ultimate determinants.

Having someone in my life that understand my mind and loves me for who I am is such a blessing. Even on his worst days he puts my mental health first. Instead of telling me things will get better he finds ways to comfort me. He finds ways to ease my mind of all the stressors and anxiety producing factors that exist in my life. I'm beyond grateful for such a kind and thoughtful person. He's taught me how to love myself and how to love my life. He's shown me how to appreciate the world and all of its beauty.

One of our many desires in life as human beings is to feel loved. Many of us tend to settle because some form of affection is better than nothing. Please never settle for anything less than you deserve. Do not settle for anyone that makes you question your worth. Wait for the person that makes you see the world in a whole new light. Wait for the one that inspires you and never fails to make you feel loved. Wait for the person that refuses to let you face your life challenges alone, the one that is always there for you in every way possible.

The moment you find yourself changing not because you were asked to but because you want to become the best you possible, you have found your person.

When someone else's happiness is your happiness and when someone else's pain is yours, that is love