How many times have I sung songs with empty words? How many times have I sung things that I don’t believe, I wonder? “But above it all, fix my eyes on You.” “But wholly trust in Jesus’ name.”
Liar.
How many prayers have I prayed that were void of any heart, any truth? I wonder, how many prayers have I prayed that I never intended to carry out? “Thank You for this day, for this food.” “I trust You with everything in my life.” “Thank you for letting me glorify You with all that I am.”
Liar.
How many times have I believed that I was a “decent” Christian, and yet have spit in God’s face? How many times, I wonder, have I believed that I was a “decent” Christian simply because I wasn’t doing all the bad stuff that those around me were doing?
I don’t take care of the body God has given me. I don’t meditate on God’s word daily. I waste time. I forget to talk to God. I let other things take His place. I make other things greater than Him. I’m not always thankful for the day. I don’t trust Jesus with everything in my life. I don’t turn immediately to Jesus when times get tough. And I don’t strive to glorify Him with all that I am.
Liar! Dirty, wretched liar.
I wonder, how is it that I can look in the mirror every single day and am not aware of the darkness of sin seeping out of my eyes, my mind, my heart? How in the world do I not see all the ways in which I don’t strive for Christ?
Perhaps...I was looking in the wrong mirror. You know, the whole world is filled with ordinary mirrors. Anyone could go to probably just about any store and buy a mirror, or at least see one hanging in the bathroom. But these mirrors are manufactured to reflect the world. I’ve looked into this mirror, seeing all the ways in which my spiritual walk has appeared aesthetically pleasing. But this is not the mirror into which I should have been looking.
The very Word of God serves as the ultimate mirror. It provides the standard of beauty to which I should compare myself. It is here where I see that taking care of my body has spiritual implications. I see that we are instructed to meditate on God’s word. We are to be good stewards of this time that God has given us. One of the most beautiful things a person could do is be in constant communication with the One Who loves them at a depth that is beyond comprehension. No matter how small or petty, and no matter how I try to skirt around it, if ANYTHING receives the praise and undivided attention that should be given to God, that is blatantly breaking the second commandment. Speaking mechanical nonsense to the One Who is jealous for my undivided attention is probably one of the meanest and rudest things I could do. Why do I say things to God that I don’t mean or believe? What possible good could it do to spew meaningless words to the Lover of my soul? Why is it so hard for me to trust my life with the One Who created it? When something bad happens to me, don’t I realize that my Saviour stands waiting to receive me, to hold me, to be the Solid Rock on which I can stand firm?
I don’t try to glorify Him with all that I am.
Liar.
Beloved.
And cherished.
Treasured. Valued. Worth dying for.
New. Renewed.
Beautiful.
I might be a liar. But I am also a child of the Holy of Holies.
I might feel as though I’m failing Him. But He still loves me. So much.
Find my worth in Him.
He loves me a lot, even despite the fact that I am...
A liar.
"Create in me a clean heart, O God. Renew a loyal spirit within me." (Psalm 51:10 NLT)