Love Yourself Enough: Walk Away From What Isn't Healthy | The Odyssey Online
Start writing a post
Health and Wellness

Love Yourself Enough: Walk Away From What Isn't Healthy

This means walking away from unhealthy people, jobs, my own beliefs and habits.

404
Love Yourself Enough: Walk Away From What Isn't Healthy
Sheena Jeffers

"I loved myself enough. I began leaving whatever wasn’t healthy. This meant people, jobs, my own beliefs and habits — anything that kept me small. My judgement called it disloyal. I call it self-loving." - Kim McMillen

I have always been a mission-oriented girl. I’ve always been good at taking general excitement and making it specific. But there are things I’ve been terrible at, like setting boundaries, saying “no,” using discernment when it comes to my time, efforts and energy. I haven’t been great at creating and sustaining balance for myself and my schedule. And I’ve had to come to a harsh truth with myself: I was being reckless with myself and with others who loved me.

It’s easy to get caught up with hurriedness. In fact, I had gotten so accustomed to living like a tornado, I couldn’t understand those non-tornado people around me.

Didn’t they feel they were missing out? Didn’t they have somewhere to be? Didn’t they want to be somewhere? Here I was thinking that people who were doing nothing were causing the problems. It took me heartbreak to realize that the tornado is what causes harm and pain. Not the community of people it’s rushing through.

So I stopped.

One day, I looked around and saw nothing but destruction. I didn’t realize what was happening because I’ve never had malicious intentions. I just didn’t realize that hurry had taken over and was seeping out in small comments I’d say, in my decisions, in what I wasn’t doing, in what I wasn’t saying.

Whoa.

Dallas Willard said, “You must ruthlessly eliminate hurry from your life.”

But where was the hurry originating in my life? Where was it coming from?

And this realization was a tough one for me but I’ll say it.

I tend to think I’m right. Or at least that I’m pretty smart. (Ugh, that was difficult for me to put in writing).

“Being right is actually a very hard burden to be able to carry gracefully and humbly. One of the hardest things in the world is to be right and not hurt other people with it,” Willard said.

When I read these words in John Ortberg’s "Soul Keeping," I felt I had found the root of my problem: I tend to always think I’m right (or at least pretty close to it) and I was not carrying it gracefully or humbly. At all. Most likely because I felt hurried and I’d proceed recklessly without thought because who has time for that, really?

I’m making time for it now.

Ask yourself: “Is it possible that your mind with its values and conscience are not even troubled by what your will has chosen and your body carried out?”

I was troubled with it. So I’ve made some directives for myself:

Listen up, Sheena:

  • Move on from old Sheena. Let her go.
  • Don’t give away your power. Do good work, but don’t give away your power.
  • Embrace change.
  • Don’t complain.
  • Be kind, fair and unafraid to speak up if something doesn’t work for you.
  • Take calculated risks. (And do the actual calculating for yourself. Don’t let someone else do it for you).
  • Evaluate your core beliefs.
  • Invest your energy in the present.
  • Accept full responsibility for your behavior, your choices, your thoughts and your responses.
  • Celebrate other people’s successes.
  • Be willing to fail.
  • Enjoy time alone.
  • Be prepared to work and succeed on your own merits.
  • Have staying power.

There are three reasons why people change:

1) They have learned a lot.

2) They have suffered a lot.

3) They got tired of the same thing.

Here I am approaching change because I have all three reasons within me to change.

I am so honored to get to be me! I feel grateful every day for my family, my experiences, my education, my peers, my life. But I can be a better Sheena, and I’m on it to be just that!

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Featured

15 Mind-Bending Riddles

Hopefully they will make you laugh.

189665
 Ilistrated image of the planet and images of questions
StableDiffusion

I've been super busy lately with school work, studying, etc. Besides the fact that I do nothing but AP chemistry and AP economics, I constantly think of stupid questions that are almost impossible to answer. So, maybe you could answer them for me, and if not then we can both wonder what the answers to these 15 questions could be.

Keep Reading...Show less
Entertainment

Most Epic Aurora Borealis Photos: October 2024

As if May wasn't enough, a truly spectacular Northern Lights show lit up the sky on Oct. 10, 2024

14574
stunning aurora borealis display over a forest of trees and lake
StableDiffusion

From sea to shining sea, the United States was uniquely positioned for an incredible Aurora Borealis display on Thursday, Oct. 10, 2024, going into Friday, Oct. 11.

It was the second time this year after an historic geomagnetic storm in May 2024. Those Northern Lights were visible in Europe and North America, just like this latest rendition.

Keep Reading...Show less
 silhouette of a woman on the beach at sunrise
StableDiffusion

Content warning: This article contains descriptions of suicide/suicidal thoughts.

When you are feeling down, please know that there are many reasons to keep living.

Keep Reading...Show less
Relationships

Power of Love Letters

I don't think I say it enough...

457581
Illistrated image of a letter with 2 red hearts
StableDiffusion

To My Loving Boyfriend,

  • Thank you for all that you do for me
  • Thank you for working through disagreements with me
  • Thank you for always supporting me
  • I appreciate you more than words can express
  • You have helped me grow and become a better person
  • I can't wait to see where life takes us next
  • I promise to cherish every moment with you
  • Thank you for being my best friend and confidante
  • I love you and everything you do

To start off, here's something I don't say nearly enough: thank you. Thank you, thank you, thank you from the bottom of my heart. You do so much for me that I can't even put into words how much I appreciate everything you do - and have done - for me over the course of our relationship so far. While every couple has their fair share of tiffs and disagreements, thank you for getting through all of them with me and making us a better couple at the other end. With any argument, we don't just throw in the towel and say we're done, but we work towards a solution that puts us in a greater place each day. Thank you for always working with me and never giving up on us.

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

11 Signs You Grew Up In Hauppauge, NY

Because no one ever really leaves.

26482
Map of Hauppauge, New York
Google

Ah, yes, good old Hauppauge. We are that town in the dead center of Long Island that barely anyone knows how to pronounce unless they're from the town itself or live in a nearby area. Hauppauge is home to people of all kinds. We always have new families joining the community but honestly, the majority of the town is filled with people who never leave (high school alumni) and elders who have raised their kids here. Around the town, there are some just some landmarks and places that only the people of Hauppauge will ever understand the importance or even the annoyance of.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments