As the iconic Jimi Hendrix once said, “When the power of love overcomes the love of power the world will know peace.” Hendrix was right. However, it all seems to be about power nowadays. Love is simply a benefit, a distraction from the hardships brought on by life’s greatest challenges. We see couples frantically coming together as if at any moment the world would suddenly end. Though, can’t a life end in an instant? Why should we be rushing love? Movies, books, television shows, even social media have modified emotion, changing these feelings into something trivial and commercialized. Is it the power of love, or the love for power? As if we didn’t think love could get any more complicated.
Love is complicated, the most complicated aspect of my life.
When I was younger, my mother and father divorced. I was six years old. The memories of them together are fading quickly.
Memory 1: He is in his office, like always. She is by the stove, a rare sight to have seen. Her face is caked in a green mask. A child yells, “Mommy is an alien!” He comes out to help with dinner.
There isn’t much to that memory. Not much at all. It is sad; I wasn’t able to experience a growing, thriving relationship like my friends did. They weren’t having to switch living with Mom and living with Dad every other week. They had both parents come to school events, sports games and concerts. No, not me. I was a child who couldn’t comprehend the power of love. I couldn’t because I couldn’t find it.
My mother began dating, well, more like trying. However, her taste in men was as bad as the taste of warm, melted ice cream: just not good. Let’s call him Guy. Guy is the man my mother wasted so many of her years crying over, complaining about, relying on. She couldn’t help herself. Love grabbed her by the ear, pulling her in any direction it pleased. My mother’s relationships were unhealthy. Although, watching them was a lesson learned. At least I knew not to trust so easily.
The power of love: Jimi Hendrix made a great point in his quote. But, what exactly is the power of love? What if there is another side to this phrase? What if this power fell into the wrong hands?
I was young, naïve, unaware of affection. I was so caught up in the past that I refused to find a future of love for myself. I was unable to hold a relationship for longer than a few weeks. I was afraid. I was scared. I didn’t want to be dumped into a pool of emotions. I was afraid of drowning.
Memory 2: A young child sits at the dinner table. She is too full to finish her food. Father comes in. He is angry, too angry.
What do you think happens? I cannot tell you.
Memory 3: She comes in, her eye blackened. “Mommy, what happened?” She smiles, “Nothing sweetheart, I am fine.” Mother wipes a way a single tear. Guy leaves.
This is the power of love, the power placed in the wrong hands. Unfortunately, the two father figures in my life were just that, the wrong hands.
Is love unattainable? I choose to believe otherwise. There are too many divorces, too many people suffering loneliness, depression. What does it take to overcome the negative connotation latching itself to the power of love? Trust.
Memory 4: She was in college. She saw him. She fell hard. He was different; different from any other guy she had ever seen, heard, watched, listened to. She felt something. She had to know. What was it?
Have you ever felt this way before? A connection can be stronger than you think. It can draw you in like a magnet.
Memory 5: She couldn’t stop thinking about him. It had been years since she had been with anyone. Why now? Desperation? No. Curiosity? Maybe. Something else? Could it be?
If you are searching for love, try looking under “The American Dream,” maybe then you will find it. Nowadays, that seems to be the only option. Luck. You will be lucky to last longer than your neighbors. What? Is this now a game?
He told her she was beautiful. His eyes looked sincere. She blushed. She could trust again. Not because he said she was beautiful, but because she believed him.
We must overcome the love for power, even if that power is love itself. We have wasted too many years trying to cross a finish line that doesn’t exist. Some learn from watching others grow together. Some learn from experience. Some learn from mistakes. It doesn’t matter how you learn, what matters is that you do. In some way, we must build our own dictionary. We have to create our own definition. So what? Is it the power of love, or the love for power?
Memory 6: She closed her eyes, took in a deep breath and spoke, “Love is too complicated.”