When things ended with a guy I was involved with, I cried. He was, in so many ways, a great match for me.I loved him very much but it was clear to me, after a few days, that we were just going in different directions with life. As a 20 something it was hard for me to understand that sometimes loving someone isn't enough. It took some time, a great friend telling me it was a toxic relationship, and some strange treatment from the one I once loved so dearly to really understand that it is better that it ended, no matter how much it hurts. Here are five signs that you shouldn't be with someone, no matter how madly in love you are.
1.You're Constantly Sacrificing Yourself For Them
If you look up sacrifice in the urban dictionary it give you three top definitions: giving up or forfeiting something valuable for the sake of another value, scapegoat, risking. Relationships should be a partnership! If one is giving more than the other-financially, emotionally, mentally, etc-and communication has not remedied the situation, then love can't save it. You can't spend the rest of your life picking up the slack of someone else, you're partners not each others mother. Sometimes in all that you end up sacrificing yourself more than anything.
2. You Have Different Ideas For The Future
One of you wants to travel the world, the other wants to settle down and have children. These are two different types of future and you can't truly have both! When it comes to the future, no matter how much you love your partner, it's not something that can be changed so easily once you have it set in your mind.
3. Neither Is Willing To Compromise
Relationships are about meeting halfway. Maybe you love pepperoni lovers pizza but your partner loves meat lovers so either suck it up and take turns getting your favorite or just do half and half. That's how a relationship works! But if you find that your partner doesn't want to compromise, or that you feel you're forced to compromise too much. Well love can't beat pigheadedness.
4. You Feel Like You're Not Going Anywhere
It's about both your future or your day-to-day together. Relationships are suppose to be supportive, to allow for evolution, change, and ups & downs. They are suppose to cause you both to grow as people. If you feel like you and your partner have just become bumps on a log going no where then realize you can't fix that with love, no matter how much you try.
5. You Can't Function Without Them
Okay yes, when you love someone you want to insert them into every aspect of your life. But tread easy that fine line between "want" and "need" and when the "need" outweighs the "want," well then you have a codependent situation on your hands. If you find that, despite your love for them, you're actually living for them and your unable to think of anything else. Well that is a sign that you're not meant to be. Healthy relationships wouldn't spark such obsession in someone.
