(Thank you to all my friends that helped me write this from our conversations and ranting about love)
I wish love was exactly how it is in the movies: simple and great. In reality, and as I have gotten older, love is pretty confusing.
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There are just so many factors that go into love. For example, timing. They say timing is everything and for some reason I feel like timing and love do not usually mix very well. What happens when you meet the right person but at the wrong time? Do you just try to make it work or just leave it and maybe someday reconnect if it really was right?
Have you ever met someone and loved almost all their qualities and being around them, but knew you could never be together? Maybe they are someone you would never introduce your parents to or maybe there is something about them that is a complete deal breaker for you and what you want in your future. It is a tricky situation because if you like them, and like spending time with them, then shouldn’t you be with them? It is like Romeo and Juliet--they are star crossed lovers, but still did everything they could to be together. Could we all really say we would do anything to be with someone despite what other people would think or that huge deal breaker that comes along with them?
Have you ever had someone that really liked you and you weren’t sure if you liked them back? Maybe you just liked the attention or everything that came along with being in “love” with someone. This one can get very confusing because while they are falling deeper and deeper in love with you, you’re still standing in the shallow end wondering if you really like them as much as they like you. Sometimes this becomes frustrating and can feel like a trap. Why should someone get to choose you and you do not get to choose them? It’s almost like we feel pressured to try things out with someone for fear we will miss the boat on something great. Or our friends pressure us to give someone a chance just to try things out. Then we get swapped away in this sea wondering if it is real or not.
Have you ever known someone is all wrong for you, but you continue to be with them? Maybe you just find them physically attractive and nothing else. It is almost like we become lost in them. We get attached and then suddenly feel that we cannot live without them so the thought of ever ending things seems to be both a relief and terrifying.
Have you ever met someone that makes you so happy you start to wonder how you ever got on without them? It is like there is never enough time with them. You start to miss them right when they leave or right before they leave because you know they will be gone soon. You almost go crazy and question if it is healthy to want to spend so much time with someone and miss someone so much when they are gone.
At the end of the day, most of my friends and I can agree that love in general, although confusing, should not be confusing if it is with the right person. They always say ‘you know when you know’. With the right person you will not question everything or doubt anything. It will feel so right you could not question it if you tried. It will all make sense why lovers like Romeo and Juliet did what they did to be together. As for now, go with the confusion. Not everyone meets the love of their life in their teens or even their twenties. Enjoy your life whether it is confusing or simple. Do not stress because although timing is hard, you will eventually find the right person at the right time or even reconnect with the right person from the past at the right time. Do not lose hope for love.
