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People Are The Goal, Not The Obstacle

"A loving heart is the truest wisdom." - Charles Dickens

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People Are The Goal, Not The Obstacle

It's day one of 2023 and I have already experienced a growing pain. This morning, I heard a very profound saying from the Cornerstone pastor that changed my outlook on people. He said, "People are the goal, not the obstacle." As someone who loves people, will strike up a conversation with a tree branch and hug anyone that will let me, I've never thought of people as an 'obstacle' but I've also never not thought of people as an 'obstacle' - or maybe I should say, I've never had the perspective that someone is an obstacle in my life, or some would say, feels like a huge inconvenience. Have I reacted and treated some people in certain situations as such? Yes I have.

For example: Driving. Please friends, do not get in my way. If you're only going 5mph over the speed limit, please move. After that confession, I am sure the police are going to find me and give me the 40 speeding tickets I deserve. Anywho, when a situation like this occurs, I increasingly grow very irritated. Depending on my mood or the situation, I may even throw them a dirty side-eye as I wiz on by. This example though, never made stop and consider that I am looking at this other human being, which whom I know absolutely nothing about, as an obstacle. Thus, gives me an "excuse" to treat them less than the human being they are.

Another example, will be a more recent one: I posted an article, not purposefully and did not expect anyone I know to even see it, about my most recent relationship. I called out a few truths about my ex-boyfriend. I was too wrapped up in my hurt, that I didn't consider the collateral damage it might cause to him and his loved ones, who are also people that I love. Since the relationship has ended, I have viewed him as an 'obstacle' or rather, a very extremely large, maddening 'inconvenience.' Now, while this person still absolutely broke my heart and treated me very poorly at times, that doesn't make him any less than. He is still a child of God. I truly tried to give him a love like God, while at times I failed miserably because I'm only human, in the end he hurt me so badly that I stopped caring about what he might feel - and that is not loving how God loves. So, you know who you are - if you end up reading this one, I am sorry for what I did. You are not an obstacle, you never were. I loved you with my entire soul and you are a forever chapter in my life's story that I will always be grateful for. You were the goal for a very long time, and now, you will be someone else's goal and I will love you how God loves you, from a distance.

Alright, everyone cool if we move on from the sappy part? Awesome. I believe I am called to share this message with those who somehow find this and decide to read it, because I wholeheartedly feel this is something we all engage in on a daily basis, but some of us truly don't intend to. However, we also don't unintentionally do it either. I am one of those people, and this message was a huge wakeup call for me - actually, it was more like a swift slap in the face and I felt super guilty after realizing it. I can't change the past, but I can, however, stay active in my present and work towards bettering myself for the future.

Everyone has their own story, their own experiences, struggles, triggers, insecurities - who are we to then get irritated when another person, "gets in our way," just because we're in a hurry to get to the next thing? I am so guilty of this. I am like a freaking bee buzzing around everywhere, going from one place to the next and never stopping to be mentally present. Where I go, there I will be, right? I am physically present everywhere I am, but I am not always mentally present. We so often get in our own way, you have no idea who God might have set to be on your path that day, but you were too busy thinking about what you were going to cook for dinner that night that you completely missed the point. People are the point, people are the goal. Love God, love people, right? Love people for who they are, not as they should be, right? That is also for those who "inconvenience" us, break our hearts, cut us off in traffic, put too much sour cream on our Chipotle burrito - I am talking to you Will, you know what you did... lite sour cream, friend... lite sour cream. Now, did I die from overdose of sour cream? No I did not. Did my stomach hurt afterwards? Absolutely. But that doesn't mean I love Will any less - in fact, I should try to understand his passion for sour cream.

All joking aside, the main point I am trying to hit home here is: Be not just physically present, but mentally present. If we're constantly in a hurry to get to the next thing, we grow irritated at anyone who gets in our way of achieving that. When the point of life is people, and if we're too stuck in our narrow-minded thought patterns, we miss out on life's purpose. So, day one of 2023 is coming to an end here soon and my first goal of the year is to: appreciate my past, be active in my present and be hopeful for my future. I am going to slow down, pay attention to the people that God places in my path and do my absolute best to love every person I come in contact with how God loves them. We're all human at the end of the day - we all need love, compassion and understanding... even if it is an abundance of sour cream.

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