As I wake up, I roll out of bed and discard my baggy Rolling Stones T-shirt. I look at myself in the mirror and I can’t help but feel disgusted at what I see looking back at me: love-handles, a pooch hanging over my pajama pants and flab on my arms. I am ashamed of what I see. Why can’t I be beautiful and skinny like every woman on television or every female pop star? Why do I have to look like this?
While I get dressed, the hatred only grows as I change shirt after shirt to hide the rolls on my stomach. Finally, after my third shirt, I give up, wrap a scarf around my neck and take one last glance in the mirror before I leave. Still, all I see is a pudgy body in my mirror: thick thighs and a butt that hangs awkwardly behind me. I sigh and head out the door.
All around me, I see women who are skinnier, more confident and absolutely gorgeous. I can’t help but shrink into myself and compare every inch of myself to them. I hate my body. There is nothing special about it; in fact, I’m ashamed of it. I’ll never like the way I look and I’ll never be good enough, no matter what people tell me. I look nothing like what I see in television, magazines, or movies.
Every day, those thoughts circled around in my head. I was tired of it all: body image, beauty and the hate I felt for myself. In the spur of the moment, I decided to do the only thing I could and change myself.
It is now week six since I began my journey to change myself. For one hour each day, I focus on myself and work out as I try to make my body good enough.
Now, as I wake up, I roll out of bed and discard my baggy Rolling Stones T-shirt. I look at myself in the mirror and I can’t help but love what I see looking back at me: a healthier body that’s doing its job. I am beautiful and I am skinny. I don’t look like every woman on television or every female pop star, but I’m proud of the way I look.
I eat healthier and I make my body happy. No, I have not lost any weight in the past six weeks, but I feel better about who I am. It’s OK that I don’t look like those famous women; I look like me and that is good enough. I’m not the same; I offer variety and beauty among a sea of women in the world. I look how I am supposed to look. I’m not fat; I don’t have love-handles, flab on my arms or a pooch hanging over my pajama pants.
I feel happier about my body and about how I look. I feel more confident and beautiful. I’ve stopped comparing myself to others and started realizing what I have to offer the world. I finally recognized what I should have seen years ago, what I should have understood without working out. There is something special about my body; it’s me and no one else looks like me. I am good enough. There is nothing about my body that I need to change, no matter how different I look than other women around me. Everything about me is perfect because it’s how I’ll always be and it’s whom I love. I am beautiful, amazing and I love my body.
I strongly believe that women don’t need someone to tell them what they should look like. They don’t need reinforcement from people to know that they are beautiful. You are special.Don’t learn the hard way, like I did. If you don’t like something, change it and be happy with the way you look. There is nothing wrong with the way you look and there never has been. All bodies provide variety in the world; own it and love it because no one else can look like you.
