Love is caring deeply for someone, admiring who they are as a person, and supporting them through the good times and the bad. Coercion is aggressively attempting to get someone to do something, usually something physical. In considering these two concepts, it's clear that the two should not and cannot coexist. However, I've seen the two appear together in romantic relationships and feel like I should point out that these two concepts should never coexist in a relationship. Coercion, in fact, is the exact opposite of love.
A healthy relationship is characterized by honest conversations, selflessness, and genuine concern for the other person's well being. Pressures, threats, and constant arm-twisting are not signs of a healthy relationship. You should never feel forced to give something to the other person. You should never find yourself being talked into something physical or having to repeatedly say "no." If you do find yourself in situations like these or worse, you may be facing coercion.
Even if you've been dating for years, consent is still necessary. Some people think that the person they're dating is their property, or that they are entitled to receive physical things from the person. This couldn't be further from the truth. Consent is not optional in a dating relationship, or in any relationship for that matter. Consent is a must-have, always. No matter the time, place, person, etc., consent is necessary, and it's not consenting if you've been talked into or forced into something. Consent is as simple as this video:
Tea and Consentwww.youtube.com
Coercion is not a joke, and it's not a minor flaw in a person. A coercive partner can quickly turn into an abusive partner. A relationship characterized by coercion rarely ends well, and it's better to not be in a relationship at all than to be in a coercive relationship. Being constantly pressured into something and manipulated into giving physical things to another person is damaging and scarring. No one deserves to allow him or herself to stay in a coercive relationship.
The simple truth is this: If someone truly loves you, they will not pressure you into anything. The point of love is to accept someone for who they are and to love their personality, their humor, their thoughts, their quirks, and who they are as a person. Yes, physical attraction is important in any romantic relationship, but that should never be the priority of any healthy, dedicated relationship. If the person you're interested in or have been involved with romantically is pressuring you to do anything at all, it's not a healthy relationship.
If you think you may be in a coercive or abusive relationship, please act now. Visit this website: https://dayoneservices.org/abusive-relationships/ or call 1-866-223-1111 for help.
