I've been trying to figure out how to write this article for a couple weeks now. We arrived here [Pietermaritzburg, South Africa] on September 5th, 2016. I guess I'm just at a loss for words regarding this whole whirlwind. There are so many emotions that have consumed my being these past few weeks, and I'm not exactly sure how to explain each one of them to you. It's killing me not to write about my study abroad experience thus far, but I want to wait.
Dear Lord,
Reveal to me everything and nothing. Let your will be done in me. Be my fortress when all I want to do is escape... lift me up when I am weak, catch me when I fall. Teach me everything you're trying to teach me and let my broken limbs collapse into your open arms. Breathe into my lungs and fill them with hope, set a fire within me Lord. Let the embers in my soul keep warm as long as I live... never let my love die for you. Never, ever leave me Lord. Tell me everything I need to know. Whisper secrets in my ear when listening to you is the farthest thing from my mind. Keep me humble Lord when all I want to do is boast. When I don't know how, put me in my place. Let me have doubts time and time again. Break my heart for what breaks yours and never let me fall asleep at night until I've loved you with every ounce of my being. Remind me to turn my ear towards the mouths of my brothers and sisters.
Remind me how to walk before I start running too fast. And If I pick up my feet up before I'm ready, make sure I stumble to the ground so I have to trust you completely in order to get back up again. All I have ever wanted is to be wanted and I literally cannot wrap my head around the fact that you're actually jealous of who I am. I am completely lost in this place you have put me in, Lord. Thank you for finding me here, I am found.
Amen