If you knew you would never see someone again, what would you say? If you knew that you only had one more day left with that person, how would you spend it? Would you sit in a room and talk for hours, or go out and do something crazy? Would you even want to know it was your last day with them? I recently read something that has been running through my mind a lot lately. The question simply asked, “If there was a book of your life, would you want to read it all the way to the end?” When I read this, I instantly said no. I didn’t want to know every detail of my life, I wanted to live day by day. I asked my family the same question, and I received a variety of answers. Some said they would read it to the very end, others disagreed. Now don’t get me wrong, of course I want to know some things that my future entails, but overall I am fearful. The world we live in today is absolutely terrifying. A life can be taken within the blink of an eye, and all we can ask ourselves is “why?” Why them? Why now? The truth is we can’t predict the future, no matter how hard we try to. You can sit and live your life in fear, or you can embrace every second you have with the people you love. People aren’t constant. Some are temporary, and some you will carry with you forever. So here is what I want to say to my lost one,

I’m sorry for not cherishing every moment we shared together. I’m sorry for the attitude I gave you, and for being under appreciative at times. I’m sorry for not spending as much time with you as I should have. There are only so many people who can leave such an impact on your life. You were one of those people to me. You would light up everywhere you went, and you could put a smile on any persons face. You showed me that there is more good in this world than evil, and that every person is truly good at heart. Most importantly, you taught me to not live my life in regret. So I will not sit here and beat myself up about not spending every second with you on your last few weeks. Instead, I will reminisce about our happier times. Not every relationship you have in life is perfect, but its the imperfections of our relationship that made our love for one another even stronger. Thank you for teaching me how to be kind and not take anything in life for granted. Thank you for showing me that life has unexpected turns and to live every day like its your last. And most importantly, thank you for being an amazing role model. You have showed me what a beautiful heart truly is and you have made me who I am today. If I am anything like you when I am older, I will be the luckiest girl in this world.

Before I met you, I didn’t believe that perfect people existed. But to me you were perfect. Your heart of gold truly changed peoples lives. You were a fighter. You won endless amounts of battles, but you couldn’t beat the war. Not a day goes by that you aren’t on my mind, and I couldn’t erase you from my memory even if i tried.

You may be wondering now if I want to read my book all the way to the end to see who else I may lose in this world, but the answer is still no. If I had known my time with her would be limited, I truly believe our relationship would have been different. I wouldn’t have been able to enjoy every second I shared with her, because in the back of my head I would know that time would soon end. There is a beauty of not knowing our future, and it makes our lives more special. The time we have is limited, and the people we share that time with are limited too.

So be adventurous, fall in love, travel the world, and most importantly; be kind. Have a heart of gold, and make your kindness contagious. Give your life meaning, and be that person to someone else. Have an impact on someones world and share a love so strong that nothing in this world could break it.

May you rest easy my angel, I love you always.