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Lost Lands Festival

Excision premieres his first ever festival with three full days of The Paradox and a f*cking stacked lineup.

Forrest Wilms

Jun 19, 2017

Dance Music

Excision

It is here.

You may have noticed the occasional poll on Facebook where Jeff Abel, Excision, was scouting locations for his own festival. Well the team landed on the location- Legend Valley in Thornville, Ohio.

The Lost Lands music festival will be the very first festival put on by Excision and his team, and will be featuring THREE DAYS of The Paradox. The Paradox is one of the biggest stage set ups to grace our faces, and having a full lineup of people playing in front of it, will truly be spectacular.

As you can see from the lineup.. f*cking stacked. It will be pure mayhem and Funtcase is sure to make the place go mental. The lineup ranges from Datsik, to Space Jesus, and Black Tiger Sex Machine, to Sullivan King. Literally the people who are throwing the hardest sh*it will be playing at this thing. I don’t want to waste any more of your time with reading this, but rest assured, this is something that must be seen.

In the meantime, here is a hype video from Excision’s The Paradox. What a feat.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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Excision premieres his first ever festival with three full days of The Paradox and a f*cking stacked lineup.

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Because have you ever had to endure grilling your foot on a George Foreman?

1. When he just wanted bacon from his George Foreman grill

2. When he had money (and Jan) issues

3. When he got upstaged at Phyllis' wedding

4. When he unintentionally saved Meredith from rabies

5. When he wore a "bisexual" suit

6. When he had to apologize to Jesus

7. When his GPS drove him into a lake

8. When he had to deal with Ryan as his boss

9. When he couldn't fulfill his most generous empty promise

10. When this happened

11. When he struggled with a X-Mas break up

12. When he had to defend his generosity

13. When he threw a classy Christmas party for Holly but she had a boyfriend

14. When he had to stand up to peer pressure

15. When Toby was "Toby-ish"

This isn't just for the single Pringles out there either, folks

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Eat the Last Few Pigs in a Blanket

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Smash Things Against a Wall

Spontaneously Begin an Irish Jig

Call Your Mother

Throw a Coffee Table Out a Window

Sing "Auld Lang Syne" at the Top of Your Lungs

Do Some Squats

Swan Dive into a Nearly Freezing Body of Water

Take a Shot

Time to be merry and bright.

"First Noel" by Leslie Odom, Jr

"A Holly Jolly Christmas" by Burl Ives

"Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas" by Kelly Clarkson

"All I Want for Christmas Is You" by Mariah Carey

"Christmas (Baby Please Come Home" by Michael Buble

"Last Christmas" by Taylor Swift

"The Christmas Song" by Josh Groban

"White Christmas" by Idina Menzel

"O Holy Night" by David Archuleta

"Believe" by Josh Groban

"Les cloches du hameau" by Celine Dion

Or at least try to do.

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3. I will go to the gym more.

4. I will go to the library and study more.

5. I will meet new people.

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