As a human, some of us might be so hard to let go our loved ones even though the relationship is toxic. Others might even choose to become stupid in love just to be able to make a person stay in their life. Some people say that we must chase the one we love no matter how hard the situation is. But we all know, it might NOT be the person who is meant for us, which is the sad part. However, that can be a good lesson to make a person become stronger.
I became friends with this guy few years ago and I eventually fell in love with him because he was determined. This guy was one of those people who spreads joy to everyone. As for myself, I was independent enough with my emotions before I met him. However, people tend to share real feelings especially to our significant other. As the time goes by, my relationship with this person was becoming toxic and unhealthy due to our uncontrollable emotions. And the more I get to know more about him, the more I realize that I lost myself.
We all know that when we are in a relationship, we should grow together and not compete with each other. We also know that when we love someone, we suppose to build stronger faith and not destroy each other emotionally, physically, mentally, and spiritually. But in my case, we compete with each other especially when it comes to a situation where we try to claim on who is the winner in every arguments or fights that we had. Pride was always the champion and I tried my best to always hold on to our situation because I was settled with my belief that I love him more than myself. But love does not go that way. Besides, he never tried to become brave when things fall apart.
I did not want to end the relationship but I was left with no choice. I let go not because he was NOT enough. I let go NOT because I got tired of understanding my relationship with him over and over again. I let go because I need to love myself first before loving someone else. Losing him made me a better version of myself, which is the good part.
You do not need to hold on just because you have already built a lot of things with that person. You do not need to stay just because you have already spent a lot of time being with that person. You do not need to choose that person just because you believe that he or she is your life. Your worth is important before entering the kingdom of love. Love yourself first before facing the reality of relationships. Love yourself first because by the end of the day, the only person who will be there for you is yourself. Lastly, do not be afraid of losing someone because losing someone might just means you deserve a better you.