Everyone experiences lost in their life. Some lost are small, like losing a football game or losing a pair of headphones. Other lost are more defiant, such as losing a relationship with a good friend or the lost of a family member. Lost is a part of life, but how can we make means with it?
Out of all the pain and emptiness, losing myself has made the strongest impact on me.
Losing myself was more than just feeling out of place. I lost my silly humor, my love for dance, my motivation, and my self respect. I lost myself in the battle against anxiety and depression multiple times, but now I have fought back.
Fighting against anxiety and depression is not just taking a sword, swinging it around, and magically feeling like your whole self again. The fight is long, confusing, and heartbreaking. Along with losing yourself you distant yourself from friends and family, and some of those people you loose during the battle. But the fight is a journey and a road to self discover, which I have done.
I can proudly say my days of depression are behind me and my anxiety comes to visit only once in a while instead of appearing everyday. I am proud to say that I have had depression and anxiety, but I do not let it define me. I am no longer losing myself to that battle. I have been found.
I have been found by finding myself within finding Jesus. Comparing my worries, anxiety, and depression to God, it seems so small. It affects me of course, but knowing there is a higher power to take care of me gives me hope. Isaiah 43:2 says "When you go through deep waters, I will be with you." Throughout my journey of lost, fighting, and finding myself, God has never left my side.
I will still experience lost in my life, but I am prepared. I know that lost is natural and happens for a reason. I may lose more, but I am gaining so much more.