Dear Society,
I can't believe I have to write about something like this. It should be humiliating that you have to read such an article as this. You make me feel like there is no winning with you. I will fail if I don't try, and I will fail if I put in the effort.
As a society, we claim that people should feel beautiful in their own skin. Young teenagers shouldn't be comparing themselves to each other, but rather than working on their self-esteem or confidence. It's not about the number that appears on the scale but how you feel inside. Well, society, you make us feel awful. You're are to blame for why an individual cannot feel comfortable being themselves because there's no winning with you. Here's exactly how, and I speak from experience.
When I go into a clothing store, I am easily blown away with color choices, styles, the brand, etc. Cute outfits are placed in front of me as they're screaming, "Come buy me!" Except, these clothes aren't actually screaming at me. They're yelling to the skinny girl behind me. I pick up multiple options only to find they are cut as a belly shirt. Regretfully, I put the shirt down as I look at my stomach and know that it would be frowned upon to ever wear something like that in public. I would be whispered and gossiped about if I even dared to wear it. I finally find an outfit in my size, so I think, and I hope. I grab a large and an extra large, just in case, because who really wants to make another trip for the next size up? Instead of walking to the dressing room with glee, I am walking back praying that it fits because you can't go higher than an extra large. Now, two things normally happen after this. One of the outcomes is that I place on the extra large and it's so unbearably tight that I take it off and make sure I grabbed an extra large and not an extra small. The second of the outcomes is I fall in love with the outfit. It lies perfectly on my curves, and I am feeling great about myself. Except there's one problem. Either my chest is hanging out too much or the dress is cut to end right below my butt. If I dare to move anywhere but straight up, my butt will be shown to the world.
I am sure everyone has read the recent story of how it was proven that American Eagle changed their sizes on their pants so that the highest number fits even smaller than it used to. Why? How did that help anyone? Here's the answer: it didn't. People who are in the same boat as me feel ashamed because the size we thought we fit in, without gaining any weight, can no longer fit because the sizes have been changed. I know I, personally, will look at clothes I find adorable but will immediately think, "Why bother?" as I put it down and keep walking. I don't want to try on another shirt, dress or pants just to be left disappointed, yet again. I hate shopping because of this reason. I am not saying I am the healthiest person out there, but I am also not the biggest. I shouldn't feel ashamed because retailers want to misguide us in sizes. Society, you don't bring me happiness and confidence, you instead bring me tears.
Here's our biggest problem. Constantly, you see debates on social media on how women should not be showing off too much cleavage from their shirts and their butt cheeks should not be shown from the bottom of their shorts. Don't worry, our men love to see it when it's out, but we should not be doing it. Women will only have themselves to blame when something happens to them because they chose to show their breasts or their butt. No, society, you are wrong. Yes, there are women out there who like that attention, but there are women like me who have no choice. It's part of the never winning battle. When did we start making shirts and dresses so low cut? When did we start making dresses and shorts so short that our butt cheeks are forced to be shown? I found a dress once that I fell in love with. I felt confident and beautiful. I didn't buy it. I didn't buy it because when I turned around to look in the mirror how the back fit, I saw my butt in the mirror. I tried on the next dress I selected, same result. You took away two dresses I felt beautiful in because you made them short on purpose. Nothing is long anymore. Remember in high school, girls, when your shorts had to be finger tips length? Good luck finding a pair that fits that standard. There's no winning. You have to wear clothes, so you buy the shirt that finally fits, but is cut too low or the shorts that are way too short. However, you will be shamed by society because you're revealing too much. What clothes fit your standards? Am I better off naked?
Society, we need to change. We need to make our sizes back to how they were, and we need to make clothes appropriate lengths again. It's incredibly unfortunate how we let it get this bad. We have no right preaching that humans should feel confident and sexy in their skin if we cannot help them. No, instead we are hurting them. I am hurting. We are the reason I avoid trying on new clothes because I rather save the embarrassment because my size doesn't fit anymore even though I didn't gain weight. We are the reasons why I don't try on the cute dress because I don't want to get my hopes up to be let down when it's cut too low or made too short. We are the reason I am not confident. It's time to change.
Please send help,
The girl crying in the fitting room