If you’re like me, you may be going into this summer dating someone who lives upwards of two, three, six, or even 12 hours away. Meeting at college is wonderful, definitely. Living in separate cities, states or time zones? Not so much. This will be my second summer dating my boyfriend who lives in Pennsylvania, while I live three hours away in New York. One of my best friends is heading back to New Jersey while her boyfriend is seven hours away, safely tucked within the state lines of Virginia.
Sometimes, long-distance relationships can be truly and utterly difficult. Most of the time, however, they help you grow more than you would have if you were with your significant other face-to-face. Here are some ways to help you conquer your long-distance dating summer:
1. Communication.
So, this is an important component of any relationship, arguably the most important, but when distance becomes the sudden, dominating factor, communication takes top priority. FaceTiming, Skyping, texting, Facebook messaging, emailing, Snapchat—utilize your phone and social media accounts to keep up communication between you and your beloved. But most importantly, talk on the phone. Hear their voice, block off time to actually stop what you’re doing, sit somewhere and talk to them. And remember that a conversation goes two ways, so make sure you listen, too. I’ve found it helpful to retreat somewhere quiet with minimal distraction, so I can focus on what my boyfriend is saying and respond appropriately.
2. Intentionality.
When you do talk to your significant other, be intentional, with "intentionality" meaning watch what you say, how you say it and when you say it. Be meaningful with the time you do get to spend talking with them, and be wise in your choice of topics and wording of phrases. Sometimes, when the summer rolls around and several hundred miles becomes a significant element, petty arguments and misunderstandings may arise. Though these are good to work through when you’re apart (though it would be easier to do in person), be intentional with how you word and communicate things. Swallow your pride and intentionally listen to their side of things.
3. Faithfulness.
Being faithful is beyond important. If anyone wants to maintain their relationship, especially their long-distance one, being faithful is the most important, beyond communication and intentionality. When you desire being faithful to your significant other above all else, communication and intentionality will come more easily. Being faithful in your thoughts, mind and heart are extremely important, and it's crucial to guard these three entities while away from your love. Avoid places where exes may be present, or where you could fall into temptation. Avoid texting or Snapchatting people you wouldn’t normally if your boyfriend or girlfriend were around, and most importantly, treat the time away from your love the way you would want your boyfriend or girlfriend to treat it.
I hope these have been some helpful tips regarding long-distance dating for the summer, and just in general. Speaking from experience, summer has been a great growing process for my relationship, so make sure you view it with positivity, and ultimately, with an attitude that’s ready to work!
