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Long Hair, Don't Care

Just kidding, we care a lot.

Kasey Chatburn

Mar 14, 2016

Ursinus College

California Sun

Long hair, we actually really care a lot. Although our luscious locks are our signature for every occasion, sometimes it can be too much to handle. Beautiful long hair comes at a price; it takes hours of hard work, practice, and patience in order to even be presentable. If you are thinking of growing out your hair, read this and second think that choice.

1. Long hair gets all up in your food. Picking your hair out of your plate of food will happen at every meal. I suggest an up-do for any first dates or fancy occasions. One day you will pull a long strand out and it will no longer be gross; congrats you're getting the hang of it.

2. Cars with no roof are your worst enemy. You might think that your hair blowing in the wind is majestic, but chances are it won't be. It will fly in all different directions and sometimes even whip you in the face...hard. The best part are the giant messy knots that you have when you finally escape.

3. Butt crack hair. The rumors are true. Showers will be a new and frightening experience when you grow your hair nice and long. Hair, especially long hair, sheds like it is its job. This means that you will find strands in your butt crack after showering. Just pull them right out, no shame, we all do it

4. Brushing your hair will become a workout. Not only will it take longer, it's much more difficult. Find the best technique for your type of hair and roll with it. On the plus side, no more arm day at the gym!

5. Buns will be large and in charge. Get ready for the birds nest joke. That's it.

6. Always have someone help you style your hair. You can not trust that every inch of your hair is completely straightened or curled. Those stray pieces always seem to pop out of nowhere. Have a friend do a quick sweep before you venture out in public.

7. Get ready to spend the majority of your money on products. Even the essentials (shampoo and conditioner) will need to be replenished much more often. The "pea size" amount of shampoo and conditioner rule never applies for those with long hair. Try "clementine size" and adjust from there.

8. But it all pays off because you are the closest you will ever be to becoming a mermaid!

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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Long Hair, Don't Care

Just kidding, we care a lot.

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There are plenty of obstacles that come when taking care of kids, but it's a very rewarding experience.

1. You get excited when the parents purchase season passes to the pool.

2. You've become friends with the stay-at-home moms in town.

3. You get a chance to eat "kid foods" again.

4. You've traded in your cute purse for a large tote bag.

5. You have at least one car seat in your backseat.

6. Their nap time is your happy time.

7. Lunch time can be a disaster.

8. You have to play the same board games repeatedly.

9. You catch yourself using the same lines your parents once told you.

10. Your "mom-mode" kicks in at times.

11. Your heart melts a little when they do something cute.

You'll never find any souvenirs with your name on it

1. You know you are up next when the teacher pauses while taking attendance

2. When “I’m going to do my very best to make sure I know all your names” is said, it may or may be an empty promise

3. “Wow! That sounds so cool! Where is your family from?”

4. You dread when people ask you to repeat your name over and over because it “sounds so cool when you say it”

5. There’s a 50/50 chance that your name will come back either correct or incorrect at Starbucks

6. People try to find shorter, easier nicknames for you instead of calling you by your actual name

7. When someone famous or fictional character shares your name, you get so happy

8. “What’s your name?” “It’s [name]” “I’m sorry, what was it again?”

9. You’ve pretty much seen every misspelling and heard every mispronunciation of your name throughout your life

10. When you find another person with an “ethnic” sounding name, you both get excited

11. Despite the struggles, your name is pretty unique… just like you

Can I be excused for the rest of my life?

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1. “Oh, so you/your family are immigrants!”

2. “Is Puerto Rico near Mexico?”

3. “Do you speak Puerto Rican?”

4. “You look too light/dark to be Puerto Rican.”

5. “Do I need my passport to go to Puerto Rico?”

6. “Geez, you are obsessed with your flag. We get it, you’re Puerto Rican.”

7. “Why are you so loud?”

8. “So does your family know English?”

9. “Oh my god, Puerto Ricans are so spicy.”

10. “So did you eat a lot of tacos?”

11. “Are you Mexican?”

Love hard, every day, and never be ashamed.

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