If you’re planning on going the distance this year with your significant other, I’ve got some helpful tips for you. After being long distance with my boyfriend for our freshman year of college, I can tell you that going the distance is tough, but it’s worth it. Stick with these tips and I can ensure you those long months without each other will quickly pass by.
1. Communication
Yes, communication is the key to every relationship. This is the biggest key though, because this is what will get you through those busy recruitment days and the cramming for finals days, as well as every day in-between. My boyfriend and I talk every day, but with that being said, we don’t talk 24/7. We’re juggling course loads, studying, naptime, more studying, and socializing so sometimes we need space to get our work done. Learn to respect your partner’s space as well as your own. You’ll quickly learn each other’s schedules and figure out when is the best time to call or FaceTime during the week.
2. Spontaneity/Thoughtfulness
There are those quiet moments where you wish more than anything that your boyfriend was there with you to experience life. So I began to plan little surprises or send little care packages while at school. This is really easy to do since it’s fun to create, quick to send, and light on the wallet. Some examples include, making a mixed CD, write letters, send silly postcards, make a photo collage, or buy cheap tickets to an event during a holiday break. It’s fun to let your loved one know how much you miss them and it adds a spark to the relationship.
3. Plan Visits
Nothing is more painful then watching couples walk hand-in-hand throughout campus. Try to collaborate and find a date for you to visit his college, or for him to visit you. This helps alleviate the rough stretch of going eight weeks without seeing each other. Talk with your parents about finding the cheapest plane tickets (because new air fares are a total b*tch) and find the perfect weekend.
4. Focus on the Good
It’s easy to feel bogged down with the feelings of missing someone terribly, but make sure to not center conversations on it. It’s completely and totally okay to tell your boyfriend how much you miss him, but focus on telling him about all your wonderful adventures at school. Keep him updated on sorority news, how your classes are going, and how much fun the football game was. Create a countdown to when you’ll see each other next because it gives you something good to look forward to
5. Trust
This is the most important thing in any relationship, let alone a long distance relationship. If you don’t have a foundation of trust, then you don’t have much of a foundation for a relationship. Have an open conversation about your expectations in the relationship while away at school. You have to trust that there won’t be “another girl” at his school and that he won't cheat. You really need to trust your boyfriend and know that you are the only one he has eyes for. Allow your mind to stay clear when you both go out to parties, trust him and yourself that you won’t do something you’ll both regret. If you’re confident and secure in the relationship, the idea of breaking up or cheating won’t even cross your mind.
