"You won't make it past three months"
"You will break up once another college boy shows interest"
The summer before moving away for college, these were the two phrases I heard more times than I can count. If I had a dollar for every time someone told me my boyfriend and I would break up, I could afford a Range Rover. I may be exaggerating a tad bit, but it sure did feel like I got told this every day leading up till move-in day.
Deciding to go away from home for college was hard because it meant starting a long distance relationship. It meant my boyfriend and I being three hours away from each other the majority of the year after spending most of senior year attached at the hip. I am here to tell you that long distance relationships in college are possible.
If you afraid that your relationship will not be able to make it, you can do it. The harsh truth is that if your relationship cannot make long distance, then it was not meant to be. A long distance relationship is not a walk in the park by any means, in fact, it takes hard work, dedication, trust, and communication.
My boyfriend and I knew from the start that breaking up for college was not the route we planned to take. The idea of long-distance scared the living hell out of us, but we were going to try it out. It was better to try out long distance rather than break up without giving it a shot.
The first few months sucked. You have to adjust from having your significant other by your side 24-7 to being limited by a Facetime call. The person you desire most is away from you and limited to weekend visits which feel like last two hours. We had rough patches along the way due to missing each other too much and debating if we could handle this for a year.
The key is communication. You have to take advantage of every chance you can to talk on the phone. You have to understand that both of you will be busy with schoolwork and that you might not be able to call every day or it might just be a slow day in general for texting. Slow days of communicating do not mean the dissolving of your relationship, it just means you both have different lives with different schedules.
One of the best advice I can give is to NOT ARGUE OVER TEXT. This is super important. Anytime my boyfriend and I began an argument, I stopped what I was doing and called him. Text arguing only makes everything worse and nine out of ten times, the argument is due to misreading texts. I cannot tell you how many times I was frustrating over a text and started an argument only because I misunderstood what my boyfriend was trying to imply. It'll happen more times than you think.
Going to college means a whole new social life of parties and new friends. If you do not have 100% trust in your boyfriend, your relationship will not last. You have to be okay with your significant other going to parties without you. You both are living away from each other and if you only go out when you are together, you will end up living a hermit life. Which a hermit life in college will end in misery.
Stay positive. There will come weeks where you both cannot come to visit and it will suck, but stay positive. My boyfriend and I did the cheesy countdown where we would text the countdown till we got to see each other again. This included counting down weekend visits and breaks. You have to stay positive and remember that if you cannot see them, there's always Fall Break, Christmas Break, Spring Break, and Summer Break to look forward to.
I am here to say that long distance is possible. I have survived a year of it and plan on continuing my relationship. Long distance will suck at times, but being able to see each other when you can is so rewarding. It makes it bittersweet on those weekend visits and you realize you would not trade your relationship for anything.
If anything, long distance made my relationship stronger than ever. We appreciate the little things and the times we get to spend together. We have full trust in each other and know nothing could get in the way of our relationship. When it comes to long distance, it is all about the little things you do for each other. Always make sure to go out of your way every once in a while to make your significant other happy. Send love letters or flowers, honestly the cheesier the better.
Stay strong because you can do this and make it past the long distance.
