When Logic's 1-800-273-8255 song showed up on my "Discover Weekly" on Spotify, I was really skeptical. I honestly didn't know that those numbers, were, in fact, the suicide hotline. Honestly, seeing as those he chose the numbers and his song title, it really kind of turned me off a bit. But, of course, just like any Logic song, I gave it a listen. And, the results were absolutely amazing. When I heard the second verse of the song, I felt like a couldn’t breathe.
"I feel like I'm out of my mind / It feel like my life ain't mine"
When you’re down, you’re down. Depressive episodes literally take everything you thought you were, everyone you thought you had. And, throws it in the god damn trash.
"I don't want to be alive / I just want to die today"
I took 5 seconds to quickly look up the number on the track title, and oh my god, it was the suicide hotline. I was shook.The song quite literally depicts the years, and years of therapy visits, pills and the thousands and thousands of break downs someone suffering from depression has in 4 minutes and 10 seconds.
Now this song, dropped in May of this year, can serve as a voice for the ones whose voices are literally ripped out by the throat and overtook by the demons inside our heads. I say we, because I’ve been there, and I now listen to this song when things get bad, to prove to me that it’s a process that I am strong enough to conquer. It proves to the thousands of depressed young men and women, that there is a light at the end of the tunnel, there is hope.
Logic's inspiring message doesn't stop there, not even a little bit. Of course, the song is powerful, inspiring and 100% relatable. But, the music video that was released is amazing. You can't help but be brought to tears. Logic chose a gay black man as the center of the video.
In an interview he says that he chose the minority struggling the most in America. "I think black people in America, young people in America and gay people in America, so I said let's make it about a strong, young, gay black high school student who's going through hell and you know uh, screw anybody else." Well said Logic. I don't care where you are in America, you know he is literally stating the absolute truth and the outcome was amazing.
Personally, I was immediately moved when the video first started. But, towards the end when the young man finds a gun and breaks down, I couldn't help but break down with him. We were there, you were there and I was there. Just knowing what he's feeling and knowing the voices going in and out of his head-it just brings you back. No matter how long you've been free of those episodes, it brings you back.
A few days ago, Logic perfomed a moving show on the MTV Video Music Awards stage. I don't think anyone there, better yet anyone watching had dry eyes. He put it in perspective. If you watch the video, 3 minutes and 9 seconds into it, the camera pans over to a woman breaking down. You can feel the energy. It's the most beautiful moment ever because you are seriously not alone, and I mean Logic, just proved it. He broke the stereotype that "no one knows what you're going through". He didn't just use his voice, he used hundreds of survivor voices, individuals who are still in a contstant battle with themselves voices. But, he just doesn't perform the song- he gives a moving speech at the end. I literally felt like he beat the crap out of my depression, he killed it for me- if it was only that easy.
"Who can relate? WHOO"
Logic didn't do this alone, Alessia Kara and Khalid killed it, too. In fact, one of my favorite lines of this song is sung by Alessia Kara. "It's the very first breath when your heads been drowning underwater". I like it so much because when you're going through this tough crap, you feel like you're drowning, but when you get up, when you get up...it might be the best feeling in the entire world.
You cannot even for one second doubt that this song will forever go down in history. In fact, just by the VMA performance, calls to the hotline increased by 50%. That is amazing, absolutely incredible that from just a song you can inform so many people about mental illness- something that (as Logic says) "mainstream media doesn't want to talk about".
Thank you, Logic, for speaking up for all of us. Depression is a war, within yourself- which is so incredibly hard to win and even speak about. You have truly given me a breath of fresh air, just when I needed it, and something to hold on to when I feel like I can't stand.
"I wanna feel alive / I don't even wanna die anymore."
