Every day now it seems someone has died and something tragic has happened. All I can think of is how truly unfair life is. Some of the greatest people I know, suffer the most it seems. And why? There isn't any clear answer.

I used to come up with things in my head that helped ease the pain of losing people I loved. I used to think God needed them sooner or their time on earth was finished along with their purpose. But I don't know if I believe that or not anymore. It's hard to believe that when things happen that are so incredibly unpredictable and so unbelievably unfair. I guess I think it's all just out of our control and the reasons behind things are far from my own understanding. And it hurts to feel and think this way. I want a happy ending. I want closure. But I also can't pretend to be someone that I'm not. So in a way I feel relief admitting the world is a mysterious, beautiful, and painful place. And that I don't have all the answers like I thought I did.

The other thing that comes to mind in tragedy is I find myself asking, "Why am I not dead yet? Why am I still alive?" And although I do not have the answer to this question, there seems to be a force pushing me towards not taking life for granted. Life is not some fairy tale. Life is really really hard at times, and when I say "hard" I mean excruciating and nearly unbearable. And yet life can also be heartwarming and full of passion and inspiring, which we must never forget. Our dreams and hopes and prayers keep us going even when all hell is upon us. So we must cling to what we love and truly cherish the people we have in our lives. We must live in the present without fear of tomorrow, because this moment is all we are promised. Things change in an instant, and even the things that gradually pass us by are heartbreaking. There seems to never be enough time. We want another day, another moment, another word. But right now is all we know we have.

The greatest gift our beloved who have passed give us is the ability to live in gratitude and to strive to be fearless. In the end, what really matters? Not our cars, not our jobs, not our trophy wives, but love and forgiveness. The people who stood by us and believe in us. Even the people who wronged us. We need to look at others as if we are about to die which allows us to look with eyes of unconditional love. Will we still be holding that grudge on our death bed? No. We will have wished to tell them they are forgiven and you love them regardless.

Life is always still a gift. Today is a gift. Yesterday was a gift. And tomorrow we hope we have. So do the things you dream to do NOW. Be fearless and loving and speak with your heart. And mostly, FORGIVE those who have hurt you. No one is perfect. We are all a mess trying to figure out this life we are given. So love with all you have. Love even more than you'd like to. You will never regret loving others. You will only regret not saying so in their absence. Today is a gift, take it and be grateful.