Being the baby of the family has its perks; you get away with more, you’re not the first one to do everything, and you have a lot of role models to look up to. Basically, being the baby is awesome and I’d choose to be the baby over the oldest or middle child any day. That being said, if you are the baby of a family who has a basically perfect older child, being the younger child isn’t all that awesome.

In my case, my sister Anna, in my opinion, is as perfect as a human can possibly get. I know, I know, she’s still human, but she’s pretty darn perfect. My sister was always an A student who got a lot of awards and was well liked by basically everyone. She is known as the great singer in the family, she was prom queen, in the high school hall of fame, received the highest award at high school graduation, started an established club in college, worked with many organizations, and is now in her final year of law school. On top of all that, she’s also gorgeous and is truly beautiful inside and out. She is the sweetest person and would do anything she could to help anyone in need. Growing up with such a great role model for a sister was great, but it also set the expectations high for me.

As Anna’s younger sister I lived under her shadow my whole life. In elementary and high school, I heard, “Oh, your Anna Kirkpatrick’s little sister, right?” Don’t get me wrong, it’s not a bad way to be recognized, but sometimes I wanted to be like: “Yes I am, but you know I am my own person.” Teachers call me Anna even though they had her six years before. I felt as if I had to do everything my sister did and get every award my sister got. I also felt that I had to make my parents as proud as Anna had made them. I also felt that I had to always be as pretty and put together as my sister. I always felt an enormous amount of pressure to be just like my sister.

Because Anna was so perfect, I never felt happy or content with myself. I always needed to be better and improve myself. I also did not look like my sister at all and was always very self-conscious that I wasn’t pretty enough, and possibly was even the ugly one in the family. I saw my sister as this person I had to be just like. My senior year in high school, I was terrified I wouldn’t get the same awards as my sister and would make myself physically sick worrying about it. The pressure to be perfect like my sister was simply overwhelming at times.

As I’ve gotten older and especially since college, I’ve come to realize who I am as an individual and not just as Anna’s little sister. I have now realized I have my own talents and beauty and will never be just like my sister, and that’s OK. Now, I can be my sister’s biggest fan and just appreciate how amazing of a person she is. I am so lucky to have such an amazing big sister I know I can always count on. I know I can call or text Anna at any time of the day and she would answer and give me advice wise beyond her years. I also know that no matter where we are in our lives or where we live, we will always be best friends rooting for each other. She is truly the most beautiful person I know and I wouldn’t trade her for the world. Having a role model like Anna is great, but having a sister like Anna is something I wouldn’t trade for the world.