Taking a trip down memory lane can be a good thing, but when you start to live there, then the struggle begins and regrets will arise. I am a person who loves memories, I cherish them. I usually prefer small gifts that I can hold on to instead something big that I won't even like much throughout the years (Future husband, if you are reading this, there go your tips). Let me tell you how bad it is, I used to never erase messages on my phone, I used to never delete important emails, I have some gifts and cards that I came with from Haiti that I still have somewhere in my room. Not too long ago, I got rid of some cards, deleted all my old messages, and got rid of some gifts that had to go.
Now, holding on to things that you like from the people you love isn't the problem at all. It is just good to know why you are holding on to certain things. At times, I would read a card or a letter and I would say to myself, I wish I did things differently, I wish this and I wish that. Then, I would find myself trying to relive the moments by playing it differently. I would change what happened and get my own results, and I would start beating myself over it because in my head it could have gone differently. Could it really? Like How do I know that I wouldn't get the same outcome with that new scenario I made up?
For a long time, I lived in the past and it is a very dangerous way to live. For instance, when I moved here from Haiti, life changed drastically. At first, the language was my biggest barrier (read There Is No Straight Road To Life), I would say things like if I was in Haiti things wouldn't be like that. Then, taking the bus became a problem early on because I was not used to public transportation. Either my dad or someone else would take me everywhere I needed to go. I started to live in the past again, and my thoughts were not pretty. When it comes to relationships, it isn't any different. I had so many great friendships that ended and I wish things would have been different. Now when it comes to the romantic side of things, I had so many wishes for the relationship I did have and for the one I wish I had.
When it comes to living in past, remember it doesn't necessarily have to be holding on to negative things. The most beautiful memories you have of the past can also hinder your peace today as well. The way you used to live, the way life was all pink, the many vacations to went on, and so on. When you have those beautiful memories, it is kind of hard to not wish to go in the past to relive them. Believe me, I know. But, if you try to live by them, that is a very dangerous way to live.
You see how the key word here is wish, I just wish and wish and wish and wish. I got to the conclusion that the way everything played out is the way it was supposed to play out. I believe that the many things that happened in my life were all there for a reason and me trying to make up scenarios will not change anything about the past, but will only steal some joy from my present and future. Also, the many beautiful memories I have can steal my joy if I try to live by them as well.
Even when it comes to testimonies, it can be dangerous to live in the past. At times, I would find myself expecting things to go exactly the way they went before by forgetting that God's blessing are new every single day. The way He blessed me last month doesn't necessarily mean that is the is the way He will bless me today, I should just know that He will come through. Testimonies should be something look you back at to remember the goodness of the God that we serve, to give thanks, and to uplift others, not a place to live forever.
Are you living in the past? In what way? What are some things you are holding on to that are not healthy? Do you know why you are holding on to certain things? Do you know why you are holding on to certain people? Is it time for you to let them go?
Holding on to things that add weight to your life do nothing but steal your joy and time. It is time to let go of the past and start living in the present. Whatever happened already happened, IT CANNOT BE CHANGED no matter how much you wish things were different. Whatever beautiful memories you have, it is good to look back at them, but not to live in the past.
Living in the moment means letting go of the past and not waiting for the future . it means living your life consciously, aware that each moment you breathe is a gift. ~ Oprah Winfrey
Always remember that memories are great, but living in the past is dangerous. The past should be a place you look at to be better today and for strength tomorrow, but not a place to live to hinder your peace and joy.
Xoxo,
DD