Living A Love Triangle: Divorce Sucks | The Odyssey Online
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Living A Love Triangle: Divorce Sucks

In the end, none of it was your fault. They both still love you. They just don't love each other.

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Living A Love Triangle: Divorce Sucks
Ashton Ethridge

I'm just going to come right out of the gate and say it... divorce sucks. It's so common nowadays though. Yeah, I'm sure the adults leaving each other feel things, but I don't know about that. What I do know though, is being the child of the divorce. At first it's like, "Yeah! Two holidays = more presents and more food! I get TWO rooms I can decorate however I want!" Then, reality sets in. It is nothing like that.

Reality

Divorce is ugly. Your parents are splitting up for multiple reasons, but we can use the umbrella term "irreconcilable differences" which just means they couldn't work out their issues to avoid it. Yeah, you do get two bedrooms and two holidays, but it's not great. You also get to be the middle man. Your parents refuse to speak to each other after the divorce is final. Not really sure why, they just do. Which means that you get to tell Mom that Dad said he can meet her at 4 p.m. Friday so you can spend a weekend with him. Or, you get to tell Dad that Mom said it was his turn to give you lunch money for school that week. It means living out of a duffel bag every other weekend, so you don't have to pack and unpack your stuff for just 72 hours. Although they aren't speaking, the hate is still strong. If you're lucky to be the oldest, you get to also worry about your younger siblings and have the added privilege of growing up super fast. You now have way more responsibility.

Holidays

Remember the "Yay! Two holidays" feeling? That's waayyyy over now. Two holidays doesn't actually mean you get to spend the same holiday with both parents at different times. Nope. It means you get rotated. Thanksgiving with dad means Christmas with mom or vice versa. The kicker? You don't actually get to choose where you spend what holiday. At this point, one parent is usually done fighting the other and will just agree. So mom or dad gets to decide who's house you're going to for what holiday.

More presents? Not even close. The parent you aren't living with has to pay child support to the other parent. Which means the child support paying parent has no extra money to spend. The child support receiving parent? Still no. They are probably on their own, unless you get a new step parent (will be discussed later), so no extra money either. Child support is being used to buy groceries and keep the lights on.

No more cute family photos. Your parents redecorate and ultimately take down every family picture with the other parent in it. That means you don't get to see your mom's smiling face when you're missing her because you're at dad's. You also don't get to come home to a hug from dad while you're at mom's.

Graduation, your wedding, first child, nope. You know, deep down, they won't stand together with you in the middle just for a 15-second photo of one of the best moments of your life.

Truth

It sucks. It takes years to adjust; to be able to get into a routine. You'll cry because you miss the parent you don't live with. You'll be angry, asking yourself why they couldn't just work it out for you and your siblings. Didn't y'all matter? You'll hate being the middle man. You'll ask yourself why you couldn't have been a better child. Why you couldn't make them stay together. Why you weren't good enough. In the end, none of it was your fault. They both still love you. They just don't love each other.

You get to live a love triangle; bouncing between your mom and dad.

But you'll be fine. You're strong. You will survive. You just suck it up, dry your tears, and keep living. I mean hey, there's a ton of new technology. You can always Skype, FaceTime, text/call, or Facebook message the other parent you aren't with at the time. Because ya know, staying married isn't as common as it used to be.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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