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Living Life With No Guarantees

Vulnerability can cost you everything, but through it, you can gain everything.

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Living Life With No Guarantees
Felix Russell-Saw

The “I'm Fed Up With Being Fat” article I wrote for Odyssey got a lot of responses. I heard from people I haven't heard from in years and got some of the sweetest notes from so many friends. That article got more shares, likes, comments, and retweets than I ever expected. When I began writing the article, I sat on my bed and wrote exactly what I felt. In about an hour, I poured my heart out about my worst fears, insecurities, and thoughts. To date, it was the hardest to share, but easiest to write. I wasn't expecting to get any kind of response from my article. My greatest hope was that maybe one person would read it and it would encourage them.

Last night, I watched a TED talk from Brené Brown called “the power of vulnerability.” The focus of Brown’s talk was a connection and how our lives are built on the connections that we make with others. Brown said that in order to connect, you must be vulnerable. You must make yourself deeply seen. Being vulnerable means doing something when there is no guaranteed outcome. She talked about vulnerability being the core of self-worthiness. It can make us feel shameful and fearful. We are shameful and fearful of the unknown outcome. While being vulnerable is the source of fear and shame, Brown says that it is the “birthplace” of joy, love, and belonging.

While Brené Brown dropped her nuggets of genius on me, I took notes. A lot of notes. 6 pages of notes for a 20 minute TED talk. After explaining that vulnerability is the birthplace of joy, she began talking about how we avoid vulnerability because of the fear of rejection and that people will know who we truly are. Her next nugget of genius threw me for a loop. Brown said, “We numb vulnerability… We are the most in debt, obese, addicted, and medicated adult cohort in US history. The problem is, you cannot selectively numb emotion.” She goes on to talk about what happens when you try to numb the bad emotions. When you try to numb the sadness, grief, shame, and anger, you automatically numb joy and happiness. You can not pick an emotion to numb.

Brown finishes the talk by explaining if you want to become a whole-hearted, self-worthy person, you must be vulnerable. In order feel worthy, you must let people see who you really are. We will never have genuine relationships if people do not deeply see each other. In one of her last sentences, Brown says, “We must love with our whole hearts even though there is no guarantee.”

I was vulnerable. Probably more vulnerable than I've ever been in my 19 years on this earth. I knew when I was writing “I'm Fed Up With Being Fat” that I was exposing a part of myself that no one had ever seen. I have seen this at work. I opened up my whole heart, although there was no guarantee that I would get feedback. Beyond that, there was no guarantee that I would get positive feedback, but I did. Yesterday, I put a name to it. Vulnerability. I pray each day that I will love with my whole heart even if there is no guarantee. From my greatest point of vulnerability, I found my greatest joy, happiness, and fulfillment.

My "I'm Fed Up With Being Fat" article - https://www.theodysseyonline.com/cant-be-fat-forever

Brené Brown's TED Talk: "The power of vulnerability" https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iCvmsMzlF7o

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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