I have never in my life been a sports person. While people were out talking about and playing sports, I was in my room reading. I never understood it. When I was forced to play it in PE I would run in the opposite direction of the ball, no matter the game. I always had an irrational fear that the ball would hit me in the face. The only sport that I semi understood, and tolerated watching was soccer. I only watch it during the World Cup.
I was raised by a father who is a huge Raiders fan, and stepfather who is a huge Chargers fan, so I have been surrounded by football my whole life, yet I never learned to tolerate it. That was until I met my fabulous roommate, Shannon, a football fanatic obsessed with the New York Giants. Living with her has been a very educational and entertaining experience. Here are sixteen things I have learned from living with her.
- Tom Brady is the worst thing to happen to humanity. Anyone who says otherwise is wrong. Apparently it is the most important thing to know.
- 18-1 is the magic number. Sorry Patriots fans.
- When numbers are listed like above the first number is the wins and the second the loses, so in the 2007 season, the Patriots had 18 wins and lost the most important game to the Giants
- The Patriots can’t perform against the Giants.
- Eli and Peyton Manning are siblings, not the same person. I have also been taught that they are both bae
- Fantasy football does not consist of fans dressing like fairies and enchanting their teams. It’s much more complicated than that.
- Invest in earplugs. Seriously invest in earplugs.
- My snapchat story is amazing Thursday-Monday.
- They score touchdowns, not baskets.
- My roommate throws better than Philip Rivers. According to her she can become the star of the Chargers team.
- You can never be too emotionally involved.
- Insults equate to a bad game, and an emotionally unstable Shannon.
- The half time performance is the best part of the Super Bowl, although I’ve been told this is not true by people who are actually fluent in football (also known as Shannon).
- Apart from the year that the Broncos blew it.
- That last play in the Super Bowl last year was anger inducing, ridiculous, and the dumbest call Pete Carroll has ever made.
- I don’t understand football that well and even I knew something bad had happened.
- Finally the most important thing that I have learned while living with a manic apart from pure hatred towards Tom Brady, the Cowboys, the Eagles, and of course the Patriots, just naming a few, is that if ever the Giants play and we get the game, RUN!